Tuesday, December 27, 2016

Bonus Points and Hoes

Happy Christmas, Jamokes.  Hope you had a good one.  Hope Santa slid down and in, giving you all that you needed.  Hope he filled you up...with Joy.  And ate your...Cookies.  Time for an update


Hot damn.  What a great championship.  Both Joe and Colin put up some big ass numbers, and it took until Monday Night for Colin to seal his championship.  Good season for everyone.

Shawn beat Jim in the 3rd place game.

Bonus Points as follows.

Colin 60
Joe 40
Shawn 20

Total points in Fantasy Football for the year.

Colin 140
Joe 120
Jim 100
Shawn 90
Gary 80
Rob 80
Adam 70
Munez 60
Hale 50
Geiss 50
Eplin 40
Folden 20

Well done on a good season.


All good things end in a tie, right?

Rob switched his pick from Dallas to Tennessee, in what ended up being a big mistake.  Tennessee got destroyed by the fuck face Jaguars, and ended the Survivor Pool with 2 champions.  Rob and I split the 60 for 1st and 40 for 2nd, getting 50 points a piece.

Rob, Folden, and I were the only three to make it through week 9, which also gave us 10 points for making it through the halfway point.

Totals in Survivor Pool for the season

Adam 60
Rob 60
Folden 30


Flip Flop again, as Geiss has retaken the lead.  With 1 week to play, Geiss has a 1 point lead over me, 3 over Gary, and 5 over Colin.  Joe sits 6 back.

It's probable that Colin and Joe are out of it.  As they would have to jump 3 too many people to get to 1st.  However,  they are still in striking distance of 3rd, and it's not unfeasible that one of them could jump to 2nd with a great last week.

The 5 point bonus went to Munez for putting up an 11 spot.


Here is what was clinched over the weekend.

Steelers winning the AFC North was gotten by everyone.

Houston winning the South was gotten by Hale, Folden, Joe, Muenz, Colin, and Rob.

And, BREAKING NEWS, about an hour ago Sexy Rexy Ryan was fired in Buffalo.  The on,ly person with that pick, was Geiss.

There are still some people with Washington & Tampa Bay in the wildcard, but they will need some help.

Colin, Gary, and Eplin have K.C winning the wildcard, and Geiss has Oakland.  So at least one person will get a wildcard team right this year.

Also, KC (who was chosen by 9 of us) could win the West with a Raiders loss, and a win.  And GB (who was chosen by all of us), will win the NFC North with a win Sunday night.

Total NFL Prediction points are as follows.

Folden 110
Rob 105
Jim 90
Adam 90
Shawn 90
Joe 90
Colin 90
Geiss 90
Hale 75
Munez 75
Gary 45
Eplin 30


16 games in and Eplin is in the lead, trying to repeat in the Bowl Pick'em.  Munez, and I are 1 behind, and Jim and Shawn 2 behind.  Kentucky Hillbilly leasdsa group of 6 people that are 3 behind, and Rob and Colin have gotten 6. Still like 24 bowls to play.

Here are the points earned so far.

Eplin 24
Munez 22
Adam 22
Shawn 20
Jim 20
Kentucky Hillbilly 18
Folden 18
Gary 18
Joe 18
Geiss 18
Hale 18
Rob 12
Colin 12

Overall Standings

College Overall Score + Fantasy Points + Pro Pick'em + Pro Predictions + Bowl Pick'em + Bonus Points.

Note:  Bonus Points have the Survivor Pool added into them.

Shawn 391+90+142+90+20+(30)=763
Adam 367+70+156+90+22+(80)=785
Geiss 326+50+157+90+18+(10)=651
Joe 324+120+151+90+18+(20)=723
Folden 305+20+143+110+18+(70)=666
Colin 302+140+152+90+12+(20)=716
Rob 269+80+142+105+12+(65)=673
Hale 268+50+132+75+18+(5)=548
Jim 249+100+130+90+20=589
Munez 244+60+145+75+22+(5)=551
Gary 240+80+154+45+18+(20)=557
Eplin 214+40+143+30+24+(5)=456

Overall Scores

1. Adam 785
2. Shawn 763
3. Joe 723
4. Colin 716
5. Rob 673
6. Folden 666 (mark of the beast)
7. Geiss 651
8. Jim 589
9. Gary 557
10. Munez 551
11. Hale 548
12. Eplin 456

70 points seperate 1st from 4th.  And down to 7th is within 100 of 3rd.

Next week:

We'll know in next weeks updates which 2 teams are playing in the College Football Championship.

The bonus points for the Pro Pick'em will be passed out.

The division winners and wildcard winners will be decided.  The coaches fired deadline is next monday night.  Chicago and Jacksonville will decide who has the #3 pick in the draft.

Basically, you will know by next week what chance you have to win and what you need to happen to get into the top 3.

Happy New Year.  Everyone be safe.

Tuesday, December 20, 2016

Slowly but surely, the points trickle in

What up jabroni's.  Two weeks to go in the NFL regular season and things are starting to clear up.  Lots of points will be distributed in the next two weeks, with some starting today.


Rob and I both took Atlanta and both moved on to week 16.  If Rob and I end up tying there will be 50 points apiece distributed.  That's it for now.


Another rousing week of picks, leading to Hale crushing it and earning the 5 point bonus.  With two weeks to play, I have a 1 game lead over Geiss, 3 over Gary, 4 over Colin, and 7 over Joe.

Everyone else is too far back to get back into it.  There is a 60, 40, 20, bonus for 1st -3rd.


Congrats to Joe & Colin on navigating the waters of Fantasy Football to reach the championship.  They are each promised at least 40 bonus points with 60 going to the winner.  Shawn and Jim are fighting over 3rd and 20 bonus points.

The games were unimpressive in score, but none the less.  A win is a win.

Quick note. This is the 3rd time in 4 years Colin had been in the finals. And actually since 2010 Joe or Colin has been in the finals every year but 1. So, that's pretty impressive by both of them.


This is the big one this week.

New England clinched their division to the surprise of noone.  Everyone got 15 points there.

Gus Bradley was fired by Jacksonville, which gave me 15 points, as the only one to pick him fired.

Seattle officially clinched the NFC West giving 15 points to me, Jim, Shawn, Folden, Rob, Geiss, and Hale.

Arizona officially got eliminated from the playoffs, which was imminent but now official.


This is the biggest one of clarity.  Cleveland and San Francisco both clinched a top 3 draft pick with their losses this weekend.  Officially noone will get all 3 teams in the bottom.  But I'll spell out exactly where we are.

Jacksonville would have the 3rd pick if the league ended today with 2 wins.  Above them is Chicago with 3, and L.A & NYJ with 4 wins.

Noone had Jacksonville in the bottom 3, or the Jets.  Geiss & Eplin have Chicago, and Gary has L.A.

LA is probably out of the top 3 but with tiebreakers you never know.  Jacksonville beat Chicago this year so if they end up tied, Chicago will have the #3 pick.

Gettinig both Cleveland and SF are the following peopole.

Adam, Jim, Shawn, Folden, Joe, Colin, Rob.

Getting 1 of the 2 teams is Munez, Geiss, Hale, and Gary.

Rushing title.  Ezekiel Elliott has a 350 yard lead over the next closest person to him.  Folden was the only one to choose him to win.  Nearly a guaranteed 20 points for Folden.  I hate to jump the gun on giving Folden the points, but whatever.  Doin' it.

Here are your pro prediction points as of now.

Folden 80
Jim 75
Rob 75
Adam 75
Shawn 60
Joe 60
Colin 60
Geiss 45
Hale 45
Munez 30
Gary 30
Eplin 15

Stat Predictions.

Sacks leader.  It's looking like it's down to Vic Beasley and Vonn Miller.  Khalil Mack is 3 back with 2 to play, so there's still a chance there.  Chandler jones is 6.5 back, so Eplin's choice has joined the many JJ Watt selections.

Interceptions Leader

Casey Hayward is leading the league with 7 picks with 2 games to play.  Noone else has more than 5.  4 people have Marcus Peters, who has 5.  So a hot finish for him is the only real chance left for anyone to score there.

Receiving Yards:

Julio Jones has maintained the lead in receiving yards despite missing the last two games with an injury.  TY Hilton and Antonio Brown are close.


There were 5 bowl games last week, everyone won between 2 and 4 of them.  I won't be adding them into the points until later though.  Either next week or the week after, once there is a discernible difference.

Point Totals

College Overall Scores + Fantasy + Pro Pick'em + Pro Predictions + Bonus

* bonus includes pick'em bonus, survivor pool points.

Shawn 391+70+133+60+(30)=684
Adam 367+70+148+75+(30)=690
Geiss 326+50+147+45+(10)=578
Joe 324+80+141+60+(20)=625
Folden 305+20+133+80+(70)=608
Colin 302+80+144+60+(20)=606
Rob 269+80+133+75+(15)=572
Hale 268+50+123+45+(5)=491
Jim 249+100+124+75=548
Munez 244+60+134+30=468
Gary 240+80+145+30+(20)=515
Eplin 214+40+133+15+(10)=412

1. Adam 690
2. Shawn 684
3. Joe 625
4. Folden 608
5. Colin 606
6. Geiss 578
7. Rob 572
8. Jim 548
9. Gary 515
10. Hale 491
11. Munez 468
12. Eplin 412

Tuesday, December 13, 2016

Points and Points and Points

Word up, scumbags.

It's snowing outside, accumulating and accumulating, just as the points are starting to in FG9.  Here's the changes since last week.

Fantasy Playoffs

Joe kicked the hell out of Gary.  Look at it this way.  Leveon Bell put up 60 points.  Gary's whole team put up 68.

Shawn relied on the kicking of Justin Tucker to squeak by Rob.

Semi Finals

Joe vs Jim

Shawn Vs Colin

The winners of this game will be guarenteed 40 points, and a chance for 60.

The losers will play a 3rd place game for 20 points.


Rob and I both picked Detroit, and they won.  The Survivor Pool never ends.  Never ends.  Never ends.  3 weeks left and we each have 1 strike.  60 points to 1st, 40 to 2nd, and 50 to each if we go the distance or go out on the same week.


Get your dick's hard boys, the bowl games are starting this week.  points for each correct game, 5 points for picking the new year's 6.  10 for the championship.

30, 20, 10 points go out to the people with the highest game total wins. We WILL be using the tie breaker of the CFP Championship game to decide any ties.  So make sure you fill that out.


With 3 weeks to play, there is another change at the leaderboard.  Happens every week recently.  Geiss and I are now tied for 1st, Gary is 2 back, Colin 3 back.  Joe 5 back.

With 3 weeks, and 48 games left, it's likely down to us 5 trying to get the 3 bonus spots.

Rob and I each earned a 5 point bonus this week for the pro pick'em.


We have one official prediction in, and that's Jeff Fisher being fired by the Rams.  That gives 15 points to Jim, Joe, Rob, and Colin.

There are a few more that should be figured out soon in almost certainty.  Seattle, New England, and Dallas could win their division any week.

Cleveland is 1 loss away from officially clinching a bottom 3 pick. San Fran as well.

Total Score

College Overall Score + Fantasy Points + Pro Pick'em + Pro Predictions + Bonus points

Shawn 391+70+121+(30)=
Adam 367+70+135+(30)=
Geiss 326+50+135+(10)
Joe 324+80+130+15+(20)
Folden 305+20+124+(70)=
Colin 302+80+132+15+(20)=
Rob 269+80+122+15+(15)=
Hale 268+50+109=
Jim 249+100+114+15=
Munez 244+60+124=
Gary 240+80+133+(20)=
Eplin 214+40+123+(10)=

Shawn 612
Adam 602
Joe 569
Colin 549
Geiss 521
Folden 519
Rob 501
Jim 478
Gary 473
Munez 428
Hale 427
Eplin 387

So, since last week, the changes are Geiss has jumped Folden from 6th to 5th.  Jim has jumped Gary from 9th to 8th.  Munez has jumped Hale from 11th to 10th.

That's it this week.  next week should have some division winners and other predictions to add in.

Friday, December 9, 2016

Quick Update

The college football awards were last night.  The only awards left to be issued are the coach of the year, Heisman trophy, and Lombardi award, which doesn't get announced until after the Superbowl.

In the meantime I wanted to give an updated Total College Football Score and overall.  It's pretty simple.  Geiss had Reuben Foster as the winner of the Butkis award, and he's the only one to get it.

Shawn 391
Adam 367
Geiss 326
Joe 324
Folden 305
Colin 302
Rob 269
Hale 268
Jim 249
Munez 244
Gary 240
Eplin 214

Total Overall

Shawn 603
Adam 584
Joe 544
colin 522
geiss 510
folden 509
rob 458
gary 461
jim 453
hale 420
munez 418
eplin 380

Tuesday, December 6, 2016

Big Mama Update 2

So, with the NFL Season now 3/4's of the way done.  Things are starting to clear up.

First things first, let's look at where we stand in the pro pick'em

Geiss has won the Week 14 bonus hands down.  Last 10 point bonus of the year.

Overall, there is finally a little bit of separation in the standings.

Geiss put up a blistering 14 out of 15 to jump back into the lead.  I was right behind with 13 out of 15.

Geiss now has a 2 point lead over Me.   Gary fell to 3 back, while Colin and Joe sit 4 back.

After that, Eplin is 8 back, Munez and Folden 10 back.

Unless someone gets really hot, this looks like a 5 person race for 3 places.

Realistically, everyone except Hale, Jim, and probably Rob can still make a move into the top 3, but they will need to go lights out the rest of the way.

Here are the current standings.

The playoffs are set!  Here are your week 13 results

Jim beat Eplin to finish the season 10-3 and earn the #1 seed in the playoffs and a bye.

Colin won and jumped from #4 to #2 to earn a bye.

Rob lost and fell to the #3 seed.

Gary won and jumped up to #4.

Joe lost and fell to the #5 seed.

Finally,  Shawn turned in a loss to finish 6th.

Here are you finalized playoff brackets

#1 Jim

#4 Gary
#5 Joe

#3 Rob
#6 Shawn

#2 Colin

Here are some thoughts on the non playoff teams:

Folden finished the season with 2 wins, both against Eplin, which is an odd way for a season to go.

Munez finished the season winning 4 of his final 6, but a bad 1 and 4 start ended up killing his playoff chances.

Injuries crushed Eplin's year, and although he was 4-5, he finished the season on a 4 game losinig streak.  He does have a win over Joe & Jim.  2 top teams, although he lost twice to Folden.

I went 7-3 after starting the year 0-3, but it was too little too late, and I'm tiebroken out of the playoffs.

Geiss put together a good comeback, after starting 1-4, he crawled back to .500, before hitting a big losing streak to end his season.

Hale played his season in streaks.  Starting with 3 losses, then 3 wins, then 4 losses.  He was a victim of some big points against early in the year, that crushed his chances.  He averaged 116 points a week in those weeks and lost every game.

Keep in mind the playoff points go as follows. 60 for 1st, 40 for 2nd, and 20 for 3rd.


My 23 game winning streak ended the same place it started, with me picking the god damn New Orleans Saints.

I am now 24-0 in two years of Survivor Pool, when picking any other team but the Saints, and 0-2 when picking them

That puts Rob & I tied up at 1 strike a piece with 4 games to go.


Safe to say the abomination that is the Carolina Panthers is officially out of the playoff race.  they are 3 games back in the wildcard with 4 to play and about 8 teams to pass.  Dunzo.

That effects the following people.

Super Bowl Winner:  Adam
Super Bowl Participant:  Adam, Joe, Gary
NFC Championship game loser:  Shawn and Eplin.

Additionally, everyone had them winning the South.  So no gains or losses there.  Other prediciton trends.

NE is near a lock to win the AFC East which benefits noone.

The AFC North & South are tied messes.

The West is looking like it'll probably be either Oakland or KC.   The Broncos are 2 games back with 4 to play.  The are also 1-3 in the division, meaning that they're unlikely to win a tiebreaker if their is a 3 game tie.

That would negatively effect Shawn, Hale, and Eplin.  If Oakland wins Geiss will be theoonly benefit of them winning the division.

The wildcard picture is still pretty muddled.  If the season ended today the wildcard winners would be Denver & KC.

Denver is 8-4, and Miami, Pittsburgh, and Baltimore are all 7-5, so you could safely say they still  are in the wildcard race too.

As of now the 6-6 teams are unlikely, and I can't see two teams coming out the South, and 10-6 might not even be good enough for a wildcard game.  So, as of now, it's still possible, but unlikely.

In the NFC this week was sort of a life raft game for a couple of teams.

Green Bay won their 2nd in a row to pull themselves to .500.  They are 9th in the Conference and 2 games behind the Lions.  But, they are only a game back in the wildcard standings.  While everyone had them winning their division, that doesn't benefit anyone.  However, 3 people have them in the Superbowl (Rob, Hale, and Munez).

The same could be said for Arizona, who beat a tough Washington team in what was pretty much an elimination game for them.  They sit 10th in the conference at 5-6-1.  1 1/2 games out of a playoff spot.  They are all but finished in the division race.

This hurts Joe, Munez, Colin, Eplin, and Gary who all had them winning the West.  Not technically out, but most likely.

If Arizona misses the playoffs this kills Folden, Voyten, Colin, and Eplin who all had them winning the SB. The best anyone is looking at this point, is Jim & Geiss who both had Pittsburgh & Seattle playing in the Superbowl.

Assuming Green Bay doesn't catch Detroit, it's likely only one of those two teams will make it into the playoffs.

Detroit has it's last relatively easy game of the year, with a Home date against the Bears.  But, then they play on the road against the NYG & Cowboys.

The Packers play a home game against Seattle this weekend.  If (big if) they can win that game, I wouldn't bet against them to end up playing Detroit in week 17 for the division.  Such a Packers thing to do.

The NFC Wildcard situation is still looking pretty good for most of us.  The only teams taht are out for anyone at this point are by virtue of the teams playing too well.  Dallas can clinch their division with another win or Giants loss, so that hurts Eplin.

The same for Joe, Munez, Colin, and Gary with Seattle.

As far as the first three draft picks go, here is where we stand:

Cleveland 0-12
San Francisco 1-11
Jacksonville 2-10
Chicago 3-9
New York Jets 3-9
Los Angeles 4-8
Carolina 4-8
Cincinnati 4-7-1

Those are the only teams that are realistically still in the running for the bottom 3.

As far as that prediction goes, noone has all 3 teams still available.  Most people have 2 teams still in the running with the exception of Munez, Hale, and Eplin.

Total Overall Standings

College Total Score + Fantasy Wins + Pro Pick'em + (Bonus)

Folden's score includes his 20 point bonus in the Survivor Pool.  Folden & Rob & I's score includes our 10 point bonus for making it past week 9.

Shawn 391+70+112+(30)
Adam 367+70+122+(25)
Joe 324+80+120+(20)
Folden 305+20+114+(70)
Colin 302+80+120+(20)
Geiss 301+50+124+(10)
Rob 269+80+109+(10)=
Hale 268+50+102=
Jim 249+100+104=
Munez 244+60+114=
Gary 240+80+121+(20)=
Eplin 214+40+116+(10)=

Shawn 603
Adam 584
Joe 544
Colin 522
Folden 509
Geiss 485
Rob 468
Gary 461
Jim 453
Hale 420
Munez 418
Eplin 380

Again, check your points.  I'm a man, but a fallible one.

Monday, December 5, 2016

Big Mama Update: Part 1

Here's Part 1of your 2 part mega update.

The college football regular season ended Saturday night, and surprise, there were no upsets.  I mean, Temple beat Navy.  But I'd hardly call a 3 point underdog an upset.

So what happened and how did it affect us all?

Final Four

Ohio St

So, who got what?  First off, nobody had Washington, in the final four, so let's just leave that be.  Every prediction mentioned in this article is worth 20 points.

Alabama - Predicted by everyone except Hale & Eplin.
Clemson- Prediction by everyone except Munez & Eplin.
Ohio State - Predicted by Jim, Joe, Munez, Rob, Geiss, & Hale.


Joe 60
Geiss 60
Jim 60
Rob 60
Adam 40
Voyten 40
Folden 40
Munez 40
Colin 40
Hale 40
Gary 40
Eplin 0

Yikes Eplin.

Conference Champions

To start off AAC & Big 10(14) were predicted right by nobody at all.  That leaves 8 conferences to score.

ACC Clemson:  Everyone but Eplin and Munez
SEC Alabama:  Everyone but Rob, Hale, and Eplin
Big 12 Oklahoma:  Everyone but Jim
Pac 12 Washington:  Predicted by Adam, Voyten, Joe, Munez, Hale
Sunbelt:  App St & Arkansas St:  Predicted by everyone but Adam, Jim, and Gary
MAC Western Michigan:  Predictged by everyone but Geiss, Munez, and Gary.
Confernece USA Western Kentucky:  Predicted by Adam, Rob, and Hale.
MWC San Diego St:  Predicted by Adam, Voyten, Colin, Geiss, and Eplin

Here's the total points earned for those. 20 points a piece.

Adam 140
Shawn 140
Hale 120
Joe 120
Colin 120
Geiss 100
Rob 100
Folden 100
Jim 80
Munez 80
Eplin 80
Gary 60

Additional Predictions.

Nobody's team outside of the top 25 finished inside the top 25, except Munez.  but his team started the season at #25 so obviously that doesn't count.

Everyone but Munez, Rob, and Hale's top 10 team finished outside of the top 25, with everyone else having Notre Dame and Tennessee

Adding those all up the tally is as follows.

Shawn 200
Adam 200
Joe 200
Geiss 180
Colin 180
Folden 160
Rob 160
Hale 160
Jim 140
Munez 120
Gary 120
Eplin 100.

Credit to Eplin, who missed all 4 of the final 4 and 4 of the power 5 conference champions.  And, I do mean credit, because he was able to make up a lot fo points in the smaller conferences, so what was obviously a bad round of predictions for him could have been much worse.


The College pick'em finished up this weekend.

Credit to Munez for picking agians the grain enough to end make up 2 points on Folden.  However, it was 1 pick too little.  Folden finished in 3rd with 125, 2nd was me with 127.  Winner and Champ was shawn with 131.

The bonus points for this go 60 1st, 40 2nd, 20 3rd.  Adding the college pick'em scores and bonus together looks like this.

Shawn 191
Adam 167
Folden 145
Munez 124
Joe 124
Colin 122
Geiss 121
Gary 120
Eplin 114
Jim 109
Rob 109
Hale 108

Adding the two numbers togehter brings us to your our Total College Football Score:

Shawn 391
Adam 367
Joe 324
Folden 305
Colin 302
Geiss 301
Rob 269
Hale 268
Jim 249
Munez 244
Gary 240
Eplin 214

This number is important because this is the number that's going to be used in the total scoring from now on.  Obviously.  The number can still change.  Where can you still score?  Here are the available predictions.

National Championship:  Available to everyone except Hale & Eplin.
Runner Up:  Available to Jim, Joe, and Rob
Heisman Trophy & Coach of the year:  Still technically available to everyone.  Finalists not announced.
Doak Walker award:  Available to me, Folden, Shawn.
Bednarik.  Available to Adam, Shawn, Folden, Joe, Hale, Gary, Eplin.
Thorpe Award: Available to Folden
Butkis: Available to Geiss
Maxwell:  Available to Folden & Joe.

Also:  Bowl Pick'em results.  The scoring in those will give 2 points to each smaller bowl game.  5 points for each new years 6 bowl.  and 10 points for the national championship.

The person who predicts the most games will get a bonus
1. 30 points.
2. 20 points.
3. 10 points.

Other than that, we move onto the NFL.

Tuesday, November 29, 2016

The Calm Before the Storm

Whats up losers.  Here we sit, one week away from the end of the college football regular season and our first massive update of the year.

I missed last week due to the short week, but I'm back with power and pain today.


Quick note, Shawn won the bonus in the pick'em last week with 25 correct predictions.  That's Shawn's 3rd win out of 4 weeks for bonus points.

This week was Folden winning for the 4th time this season.

Overall, we're going to see some bonus points paid out next week.  Shawn has a 3 game lead over me, and a 7 game lead over Folden at 3rd place.

It's pretty safe to say that Shawn is good for either 1st or 2nd in the college pick'em, with either 60 or 40 points going his way.

I'm at 126, Folden 122, Joe and Colin 121, and Munez 119.

There are only 8 games on the slate this week, so there isn't a ton of room to make moves.

Pro Pick'em continues to be tight.

Gary has a 1 point lead over Geiss, 2 over me and Joe, and 3 over Colin.  Eplin had a particularly bad week falling from a share of the lead to 5 back and in 6th place in the overall pick'em.

This is the last week of the 10 point bonus.  After this we will have 5 points the rest of the way out.


Ah, the game that never ends.  Week 11 brought us another victim as Folden took KC and lost. Folden gets 20 points for coming in 3rd.  That brought Rob and I to week 12 as the only people left in the league.  I took the NYG and he took the Saints, both of us surviving.

That puts him with 1 strike going into week 13, and me with no strikes riding a 23 game survivor streak going back to last year.


So, we aren't going to get into any pro predictions this week, but we will talk about a couple of College Predictions.

Appalachian State has won at least a share of the Sun Belt, which earns 20 points for Folden, Joe, Munez, Colin, Rob, Hale, and Eplin.  If Arkansas St wins this weekend they will earn a share as well for Shawn and Geiss.

Gary, Jim, and I are out of that conference. Arkansas St also plays Texas St who is 2-9 on the year, so ya know...Figure it out.

Additionally, Tennessee & Notre Dame are looking like locks to finish out of the Ap top 25.

This will give 20 points to Me, Jim, Shawn, Folden, Joe, Colin, Geiss, Eplin, and Gary.

As of now, none of our unranked teams we picked to finish in the Top 25 are in the top 25.  Boise St is knocking on the door, which would give 20 points to Shawn, Folden, Rob, and Hale.  But, with them being off this week, it may be difficult.

The Conference Championships are this week and this what the schedule looks like

De Facto Big 12 Championship Game
Oklahoma Vs Oklahoma St

Oklahoma winning would keep them alive for a chance at a playoff appearance, which helps a lot of people.  Also, a win would give everyone 20 points but Jim for the Big 12 championship.

PAC 12 Championship
Colorado vs Washington

A win for Washington would give Pac 12 points to Me, Shawn, Joe, Munez, and Hale.  A loss helps everyone else out.  Noone had Colorado or Washington in the playoff

Big 10 Championship Game
Wisconsin vs Penn St

Everyone had either Michigan or Ohio State winning the Conference.  So, noone will get Big 10 points this year.

SEC Championship Game
Alabama Vs Florida

Alabama is favored by like 25 points, so it could be a blow out.  Eplin, Hale, and Rob are the only people to not have Alabama winning this Conference.

ACC Championship
Clemson vs Va Tech

Munez and Eplin were the only two to keep Clemson out of the ACC Championship, everyone else will get point if Clemson wins.

MAC Championship
Western Michigan vs Ohio

9 people had Western Michigan winning the MAC.  Munez and Gary had Ohio.  Geiss had Bowling Green and is the only person without a chance.

Conference USA

Western Kentucky VS Louisiana Tech

Many people had Southern Miss and Marshall.  Rob, Hale and I had Western Kentucky.

Mountain West

San Diego St vs Wyoming

Me, Shawn, Colin, Geiss, and Eplin have a shot with San Diego St this weekend.   Everyone else had Boise and are out of it.

Most of the College Football Awards finalist have been released, except the Heisman and Lombardi award.  As usual, most of our predictions have lost, but there are a couple dangling out there

Doak Walker, Dalvin Cook, picked by Me, Shawn, and Folden.

Thorpe Award, Tre'Davio White, picked by Folden.

Butkis Award:  Rueben Foster, picked by Geiss

Maxwell Award: Baker Mayfield picked by Joe and Folden.

No word yet on the AP Coach of the year, Lombardi or Heisman finialists.


Here are the current standings with 1 week to go.

*1. Jim 9-3
*2. Rob 8-4
*3. Jim 8-4
4. Colin 7-5
5.  Shawn 7-5
6. Gary 7-6
7. Adam 6-6
8. Hale 5-7
9. Munez 5-7
10.  Geiss 4-8
11. Eplin 4-8
12. Folden 2-10

Jim, Rob, and Joe are clinched for sure.  They are playing for 1st round BYE in playoffs.

Shawn and Colin are locks as well.  All they'll have to do is basically field a lineup and they would win.

Gary's 6 seed is the only one up for grabs.  It breaks down like this.  If Gary wins he's in.

If Gary loses, I win, and I outscore Gary by 52 points, I'm in.  So Gary's about a 98% sure thing as well.

Week 13 matchups:

Jim 9-3 vs Eplin 4-8
Jim locks up a first round bye with a win.

Gary 7-5 vs Hale 5-7
Gary needs a win or a general strong showing.

Rob 8-4 vs Geiss 4-8
A win pretty much locks up a Bye for Rob

Joe 8-4 vs Munez 5-7
Joe needs a win and a little help for a Bye week.

Colin 7-5 vs Folden 2-10
Colin is a lock for playoffs and can still get a Bye with a win, and a Rob and Joe loss in which Rob doesn't outscore Colin by more than 30 points.

Adam 6-6 vs Shawn 7-5.  This is the only game of two teams at .500 or better so let's go ahead and call it the game of the week.  Shawn can get a bye with a win and a Rob, Joe, and Colin loss.  or by outscoring Colin by 40 points.
I need to win and to get help from Gary.

Total Points

This is going to be our last update before things get wild, so let's get a point update

Fantasy wins + Pro pick'em + college pick'em + (pick'em bonus) + [Survivor Pool] + Predictions

Folden will have his 20 points in the survivor pool added in here.  All three of us will have our 10 point bonus for making past week 9.  This also won't have any of the predictions added in.  Will wait til next week and go from there.

Rob 80+100+108+[10]+20
Joe 80+109+121+(20)+40
Colin 70+108+121+(20)+40
Shawn 70+103+129+(30)+20
Gary 70+111+116+(20)+20
Adam 60+109+126+(15)+[10]+20
Hale 50+92+105+20
Munez 50+103+119+20
Geiss 40+110+117+20
Eplin 40+106+112+(10)+40
Folden 20+104+122+(40)+[30]+40

1 Joe 370
2. Colin 359
3. Folden 356
4. Shawn 352
5. Adam 340
6 Gary 337
7 Rob 318
8 Jim 308
8 Eplin 308
10 Munez 292
11 Geiss 287
12 Hale 267

A couple of notes.  These points are really indictitive of the standings as much as they are just a total of what has been earned.  Some people got 20 points for winning the Sunbelt, while Geiss & Shawn didn't, but could easily have it next week.

Folden's point total includes his survivor 3rd place, while Rob & mine doesn't include ours, although at the least we will have 40 more points.

Also, the college predictions are coming through next week.

There are a total of 320 potential College prediction points that will be finalized next week.
There is a 60, 40, & 20 point college pick'em bonus that will be resolved next week.
There is a 60 and 40 point survivor pool bonus that could be issued out any week now.

And that doesn't include anything with the NFL that's going to start and resolve in the next couple of weeks.

So...the point is.  Noone is safe, noone is behind.  The 2nd half of Football God IX starts next Monday.

Tuesday, November 15, 2016

Update City

Here's an update of the events that recently transpired in our pathetic fantasy lives.


So, Folden & I took Baltimore over Cleveland.  Rob took Arizona over San Francisco.  Steady as she goes.   No loses or any changes.


Pro Pick'em

Geiss has maintained his lead in the pick'em, and things remain close.

Eplin & Rob led the way with 8 correct a piece.

Overall, Geiss has a 2 point lead over Gary, and a 4 point lead over Eplin, Joe, and myself.

College Pick'em

I have maintained my lead over the field, but not without letting things get super close.  Shawn crushed the pick'em with 14, Joe with 13, Hale with 12, and four people at 11.  I was back at 9 letting the field close in.  

There are only 3 weeks left in the college pick'em so make your moves boys.

Overall, I have a 3 game lead over Shawn and Colin and a 4 game lead over Joe.  Gary is 7 back.

Shawn won the bonus with 20 correct predictions.


Lots to report on this front, but let's start with last week's results.

Gary took a garbage time Antonio Brown to top Colin.

Rob pounded Folden, leading to Folden's 9th straight loss.

Munez beat up Eplin to stay alive.

Joe put up a huge number beating Shawn.

Jim continued cruizing, beating Geiss.

I squeaked by Hale, making him 3-7 on the season, eliminating him from the playoff race.


Current Playoff Standings

1. Jim

4. Shawn
5. Gary

3. Colin
6. Joe

2. Rob

Three weeks to go.

1.  Jim is all but mathematically into the palyoffs.  He's 8-2 with a 3 game lead on the playoffs with 3 to play.

Playoff chances 99.5% (none of these percentages are actually math based).

2.  Rob is 7-3, with a high point total.  Only losing out and losing a tie breaker would keep him out.

Playoff chances 97%

3 & 4 Colin & Shawn.  They are both 6-4 with 1183 & 1187 points scored.  That's 100 points higher than anyone that could test them.  One win should net them a playoff spot.  Losing out would make it tough.  As long as they're team doesn't start putting up like 60 point games, tie breakers shouldn't be an issue.

Playoff Chances 75%

5.  Gary is 6-4 with a good point total.  His situation is similar to Colin & Shawn but with 80 less points scored he is more susceptible to someone overtaking him

Playoff chances 64%

6.  Joe is 6-4 but has only outscored me by 12 points, meaning a tie breaker between he and I is very much up in the air.  He does have a game up on the playoffs, so he's still trending in the right direction.  He has a tough road down the stretch though.

Playoff Chances 57%

7. Adam -  I'm 5-5 with 3 games to play.  I'm close to Joe, as mentioned before, and have a decent schedule in my favor.  I'm 5-2 in my last 7 games, but sit a game back

Playoff Chances 41%

8.  Geiss - Geiss is 4-6 and needs some help to get into the playoffs.  He's certainly able to help himself out, with games against Shawn & Gary remaining.  He's going to need to win out and get some help.  But he could still take a tie breaker away from many people if his team shows up.

Playoff Chances 20%

9 and 10.  Munez & Eplin are in different situations.  With lower point totals they are going to need to win out & hope that a lot of teams in front of them lose.  Gary & Joe play each other next week, meaning one of them will lose.  If Eplin can beat me, and Munez wins they would each be 1 game back of the last playoff spot with 2 games to play.  They basically would need to win out, hope that Gary, Joe, Shawn, or Colin loses out, and that I go 1-2.

Playoff Chances 2%

11. Hale has lost 4 in a row and needs a miracle to sneak in.  Based on the schedule that's left I'm not even sure if it's possible, but I'm not sure.

Playoff Chances 0.1%

12. Folden

Playoff Chances:  Yahoo clitch that changes all of our records, and Yahoo refuses to acknowledge or change anything.


Jim 8-2 vs Hale 3-7

This game has a lot less impact that most of the other ones so it'll be covered first.  Jim's pretty much just working on a bye now.  Jim can officially clinch a playoff spot with a win or another loss from me.

Hale needs the aforementioned miracle to get into the playoffs, but there are still 10 points in the overeall standings up for grabs.

Munez 4-6 vs Folden 1-9

Munez needs a win to stay in it.  Folden needs a good soak.

Adam 5-5 vs Eplin 4-6

This game has a lot of impact on the standings next week.  A loss for me sure's up the playoffs for a lot of people.  Me losing could mean a clinched spot for Rob & Jim.  Eplin needs to win to stay in it.  I need to win to not be on skid row.

Geiss 4-6 vs Shawn 6-4

This game works as an elimination game for Geiss as well.  Geiss's best player is on bye, and so is Shawn's.  They are both riding 2 game losing streaks, and one will get on the right track.

Rob 7-3 vs Colin 6-4

The last thing Colin needs is another loss.  Although he looks great for the playoffs now, he looked better last week.  And, another loss would decrease those chances again.  Rob can punch his ticket with a win and an Adam loss.


Joe 6-4 vs Gary 6-4

Man, who else could it be?  The 5 & 6 seed playing each other.  The result of which puts one in the drivers seat for the playoffs and the other one potentially on the outside looking in.  A lot at stake for these two teams this week.

That's it.  Make sure you guys all say your prayers & take your vitamins.  What ya gonna do?  When Hulkamania runs wild on you.

Monday, November 14, 2016

Prediction Heavy Update

Another week in the books.  And finally, a little clarity is starting to come out of some of the predictions.  We'll start with the NFL.

There isn't much to take off yet.  But a couple of things have become clear.

The Jacksonville Jaguars aren't going anywhere but down this year.  They are twink bottom's, and the rest of the NFL are their power tops.  That leads to a red out for me, having them win the division.  Also, for Jim and Voyten for having them in the wildcard.

Of course none of this is mathematical yet, but the writing's on the wall.

This can also be said about the lowly, Bryce (rather it be Tom) Petty starting at QB.

Nothing else really looks all that clear except for the Top three picks in 2017 draft category.

Basically, anyone that is 5-4 or better I marked out of this category.

So, Detroit, Phili, Miami, Oakland, Tennesee, and Dallas were all marked out.

This is one each for everyone, 2 out for Hale, and none marked out for Geiss & Rob.

Individual award are a little diffrent.  The rushing title is Elliott's to lose, and Folden was the only person to pick him.  Colin has David Johnson, who is about 300 yards behind him, but we'll leave him as a possible at the moment.

Receving yards leader - 11 of the 12 of us had Antonio Brown, with Eplin choosing Julio Jones.  Julio has a good lead over the next closest Brown is almost 300 yars back.

Our sacks leader category.  Everyone is still in it but Voyten, Munez, Rob, and Hale who all chose J.J Watt.

Intereceptions leader- Four people had Marcus Peters who is tied for the lead league with 5.  The other 6 people who were chosen for this award have a combined 7 interceptions.  So, do with that what you will.  Earl Thomas and Patrick Peterson have 2 each, so I suppose if they get hot they can make it to the leaderboard.

That's about it for the NFL this week.


So, College went a little crazy this weekend.  So crazy, in fact, that not that much changed.  8 top 25 teams lost, and 5 in the top 10.  So when the dust settled nobody had vastly improved or fallen back.

If anything, it opened the door for teams like Oklahoma to maybe squeeze their way in.  So, we'll just leave the Playoff alone right now.  Let it play itself out.

As far as the conference champions go.


This conference we all have Houston, so although it's starting to look like the may lose it.  It's irrelevant for our purposes.


If Clemson beats wake forest they are in the championship game.  Good for the 10 people who picked them to win the ACC, bad for the 2 that didn't.

Big 12 is similar.  Oklahoma wins it if they beat WVU and Oklahoma State.  Oklahoma State gets it if they win out.  WVU wins it if they beat Oklahoma and Oklahoma beats OK State.

Only person this matters for is Jim, who was the only one who took TCU instead of Oklahoma.  So he would be rooting against Oklahoma.  Irrelevant for the rest of us.

The Big 10 is a bit more crazy.  We all took Michigan or Ohio State. And Shawn took Iowa.  If Michigan wins out, then they are in the conference championship.  If Penn St wins out and Ohio st wins out, then Penn St is in the conference championship.  If Penn St loses and Ohio St wins out they are in the conference championship.  Gun in mouth.

Conference USA's championship game is going to be between Louisiana Tech and either Old ODominion and Western Kentucky.  Most likely Western Kentucky.  Rob, Hale, and I were the only ones to take Western Kentucky.  Noone else took the other 2 schools.  Lots of Southern Miss down the shitter.

MAC - the MAC is shaping up to be between Western Michigan & Ohio.  Geiss being the only person to not choose one of those schools is the only one that's out.

MWC - This one is a little bit more muddled.  San Diego St has won their side of the conference. Wyoming was in the driver's seat but lost to UNLV this weekend.  That puts them, Boise, and New Mexico all at the top of their bracket.  If Wyoming wins out they will play in the conference championship, but they play 2 tough games against SDSU & New Mexico.  So, this may be Boise State's conference still.

We all had either Boise or SDSU.

PAC 12 - Most people took Stanford.  But, Hale, Munez, Joe, Voyten, and I took Washington.  If Washington beats Arizona St and Washington State they are in the Conference Championship,.  If not they aren't.  That simple.

The SEC is between Florida & Alabama. That's it there.

The God Loving Sun Belt - Gary, Jim, and I have already been eliminated in this conference.  Everyone else has Arkansas St or App St.  Arkansas St and Troy are still in this one, and play each other this weekend to see who has the lead.  Applachian St needs to win out and get some help.

So that's it.  Will do a short fantasy, pick'em, survivor pool update tomorrow.


Tuesday, November 8, 2016

Point Update For Reelz 'Dis Time

Gonna bring you guys some stank on some points.  But first the usual


Still 3 of us.  Rob, Folden, Adam.  We all have earned our 10 points for making it past the halfway point in the season.  That will be factored into the points.


Gary and Munez led the way with 11, and a bunch of people had 10.

Gary and Colin led the way int the NFL with 10.

Obviously, Gary won the bonus.  His second in three weeks.  Did you start paying someone to make your picks, Yingst?  Shooting up the standings lately.

Overall, I maintain a 5 point lead over Colin and a 6 point lead over Gary.  Shawn and Folden are 8 back, and Folden fell back to 9 back.

In Pro Pick'em, Geiss holds a razor thin 1 point lead over Joe, 2 over Gary, 3 over Colin, 4 over me, and 5 over Eplin and Folden.


Nothing much to talk about in the predictions this week, so we'll just jump ahead to Fantasy Football

In a shootout that had a combined 280 points, I beat Geiss to move to 4-5.  Geiss and I are

Jim took Joe out by 2 points and moves into sole possession of 1st place.  Joe moves down to 6th place on the playoff bubble.

Shawn got spanked by Colin.  They share the 2 and 3 spots.

Gary took care of Folden's shitty team to move to 5-4.  Folden is 1-124.

Rob narrowly beat Munez to move to 6-3.  Munez to 3-6

Eplin eeked out Hale by 5, moving to 4-5.  Hale to 3-6.

Playoffs as of right now look like this.

1. Jim

4. Rob
5. Gary

3. Colin
6. Joe

2. Shawn

As far as playoff likelihood we're getting closer to that.  There are 4 games to play.

1. Jim has a 3 game lead over the playoffs, but his point total is pretty low (tiebreaker).  Jim will likely need to go 1-3 down the stretch to get into the playoffs, so he's pretty well set.

2-4  Shawn, Rob, Colin

These 3 are the top 3 point scorers, and have a  2 game lead over the playoffs.  1-3 would likely get them in, but not for sure.  2-2 is a pretty sure thing.

5-6  Gary and Joe
7-9 Adam, Geiss, Eplin

Here's the meat of the playoff race right here.  Gary and Joe are each 5-4.  The 3 of us are 4-5.

It's likely to come down to whoever can get to 7-6 and keep a good point total.  Joe may need to go 3-1 to make the playoffs. 2-2 should be good for Gary.

Eplin's pour point total means he'll likely need to go 4-0 down the stretch.

10 -11  Hale & Munez

Lose and you're out.  That simple

12. Folden



Fantasy wins + college pick'em + pro pick'em + Survivor Pool + (bonus) = Total

Jim 70+80+67
Rob 60+81+76+10
Colin 60+95+80+(20)
Shawn 60+92+76+(10)
Gary 50+94+81+(20)
Joe 50+92+82+(20)
Adam 40+100+79+10+(15)
Geiss 40+88+83+
Eplin 40+89+78+(10)
Hale 30+81+65
Munez 30+88+74
Folden 10+91+78+10+(30)

1. Colin 255
2 Gary 245
t3 Adam 244
t3 Joe 244
5 Shawn 238
6 Rob 227
7 Folden 219
t8 Jim 217
t8 Eplin 217
10 Geiss 211
11 Munez 192
12 Hale 176

So there's the standings.  To give an idea of the importance of the pick'em and bonus.  Although Folden is in last in the fantasy league, he is above Jim overall who is in first.  Makes a big difference to do well in those pick'ems.

Colin has been in 1st for 2 consecutive point updates now.  Joe has gone from 1st to 2nd to 3rd in three updates.

Obviously.  As usual.  The big updates come in about 4 weeks.  But this is how she stands as of now.

Point Update For Reelz 'Dis Time

Gonna bring you guys some stank on some points.  But first the usual


Still 3 of us.  Rob, Folden, Adam.  We all have earned our 10 points for making it past the halfway point in the season.  That will be factored into the points.


Gary and Munez led the way with 11, and a bunch of people had 10.

Gary and Colin led the way int the NFL with 10.

Obviously, Gary won the bonus.  His second in three weeks.  Did you start paying someone to make your picks, Yingst?  Shooting up the standings lately.

Overall, I maintain a 5 point lead over Colin and a 6 point lead over Gary.  Shawn and Folden are 8 back, and Folden fell back to 9 back.

In Pro Pick'em, Geiss holds a razor thin 1 point lead over Joe, 2 over Gary, 3 over Colin, 4 over me, and 5 over Eplin and Folden.


Nothing much to talk about in the predictions this week, so we'll just jump ahead to Fantasy Football

In a shootout that had a combined 280 points, I beat Geiss to move to 4-5.  Geiss and I are

Jim took Joe out by 2 points and moves into sole possession of 1st place.  Joe moves down to 6th place on the playoff bubble.

Shawn got spanked by Colin.  They share the 2 and 3 spots.

Gary took care of Folden's shitty team to move to 5-4.  Folden is 1-124.

Rob narrowly beat Munez to move to 6-3.  Munez to 3-6

Eplin eeked out Hale by 5, moving to 4-5.  Hale to 3-6.

Playoffs as of right now look like this.

1. Jim

4. Rob
5. Gary

3. Colin
6. Joe

2. Shawn

As far as playoff likelihood we're getting closer to that.  There are 4 games to play.

1. Jim has a 3 game lead over the playoffs, but his point total is pretty low (tiebreaker).  Jim will likely need to go 1-3 down the stretch to get into the playoffs, so he's pretty well set.

2-4  Shawn, Rob, Colin

These 3 are the top 3 point scorers, and have a  2 game lead over the playoffs.  1-3 would likely get them in, but not for sure.  2-2 is a pretty sure thing.

5-6  Gary and Joe
7-9 Adam, Geiss, Eplin

Here's the meat of the playoff race right here.  Gary and Joe are each 5-4.  The 3 of us are 4-5.

It's likely to come down to whoever can get to 7-6 and keep a good point total.  Joe may need to go 3-1 to make the playoffs. 2-2 should be good for Gary.

Eplin's pour point total means he'll likely need to go 4-0 down the stretch.

10 -11  Hale & Munez

Lose and you're out.  That simple

12. Folden



Fantasy wins + college pick'em + pro pick'em + Survivor Pool + (bonus) = Total

Jim 70+80+67
Rob 60+81+76+10
Colin 60+95+80+(20)
Shawn 60+92+76+(10)
Gary 50+94+81+(20)
Joe 50+92+82+(20)
Adam 40+100+79+10+(15)
Geiss 40+88+83+
Eplin 40+89+78+(10)
Hale 30+81+65
Munez 30+88+74
Folden 10+91+78+10+(30)

1. Colin 255
2 Gary 245
t3 Adam 244
t3 Joe 244
5 Shawn 238
6 Rob 227
7 Folden 219
t8 Jim 217
t8 Eplin 217
10 Geiss 211
11 Munez 192
12 Hale 176

So there's the standings.  To give an idea of the importance of the pick'em and bonus.  Although Folden is in last in the fantasy league, he is above Jim overall who is in first.  Makes a big difference to do well in those pick'ems.

Colin has been in 1st for 2 consecutive point updates now.  Joe has gone from 1st to 2nd to 3rd in three updates.

Obviously.  As usual.  The big updates come in about 4 weeks.  But this is how she stands as of now.

Tuesday, November 1, 2016

'Member November? I Member!

What's up Pusssssssssssy's.  It's November 1st, officially bringing in the month of Football God where we Bring.  The.  MEAT.

By the end of the month we'll have a solid idea of where we are heading down the way.  We'll be looking forward to Conference Championship week, and heading down the stretch run in the NFL's regular season.

One more month and we'll know where we all, as Jabrones, far and wide stand.

Until then, here's another point update.


He who trusts in Sam Bradford doth feel the pain of a thousand loses.

The Vikings not only shit themselves Monday, but their aim was so bad they somehow missed their pants, getting crushed by the born loser (in football not in life) Jay Cutler & Company.

Let's light up a victory smoke, Jay.

That eliminates Joe and Hale and also gave Rob his first strike of the season.  So what does that mean?

Means this mother fucks.

Adam  :)
Rob    X
Folden X
Everyone Else

As far as points go, it guarentees the three of us left some mos def points.

I am guarenteed the 10 points for making it past week 9, although that won't be factored in until it's actually earned.  Rob and Folden can each get that 10 points if they survive through this week.  Other than that we are all playing for the 60, 40, 20 points that goes to 1st, 2nd, and 3rd.

If Folden and Rob were to go out this week they would split 2nd and 3rd points for 30 each.  If we all went out in the same week, we'd split the total sum of 120.  Just a heads up if we get to that point.


College pick'em was sheered by Voyten this weekend.  Putting up 12 with the next closest at 8.  Geiss and Gary led the way in the Pro Pick'em with 9 a piece.With a total of 20 on the week, Shawn also won the bonus.

Here's the way the bonus has paid out so far.

Week 1: Adam (5 pts)
Week 2: Adam, Eplin, Joe
Week 3: Folden & Joe
Week 4: Colin
Week 5: Folden
Week 6: Colin
Week 7: Folden
Week 8: Gary
Week 9: Shawn

Overall, Dan seperated himself from the crew a little bit.  He's 1 up on Joe, 4 up on Gary, 5 up on Me, Colin, Folden, and Eplin.

In College pick'em I was able to raise my lead back to 5, but where as a few weeks ago it was Folden, Myself, and Colin in contention things have changed.

I have 90, Colin, Folden and Joe are at 85, Gary and Shawn at 83.


Green means still in it: Yellow means teetering: Red means out (for all intents and purposes).


Carolina:  They got a win this weekend keeping them with a relative chance to win their division or get a wildcard spot.  A few people have them in or winnng the NFC Championship so that's a break for us.

Arizona:  They started really shitty, but have turned it around a little bit.  They were 1-3 and now sit at 3-4-1.  Luckily for every NFC team, only 3 teams have 5 or more wins.  1 of those is the implodable Falcons, one is the collapsing Vikings, and one is Dallas, who is starting a rookie QB.  After that there are 9 teams with either 3 or 4 wins.  meaning that noone is really out of it yet.  Except the 49ers.  They just suck so bad.

Dallas:  Speaking of Dallas, they are at the top of the NFC right now, which is awesome for Voyten, Munez, and Geiss who had the stones to keep them winning the NFC East after Romo got hurt.  The bad news?  Every NFC East team is above .500 right now.

So, nothing redded out in the NFC yet.


What the fuck is going on in the AFC West?

Oakland, Denver, KC:  All 3 of these teams still are in teh division race.  None of them have more than 2 losses.  I guess Oakland has the tie breaker right now, but who the hell knows how this shakes out.

Houston, Jacksonville, Indi:  All three of these teams were picked to win the division, and so far, Houston is the only one that's living it up.  Jacksonville is about one more loss away from hitting the red though.

Jets:  Two desperation wins have kept their season alive.  And, with games against Miami and LA before their Week 11 Bye, they could reasonably get themselves back into this.  They have 2 brutal games against NE but the rest of the schedule sets up nice for them.  Win one of those against NE and beat the bad teams, New York could have a shot. Still,  I feel more comfortable with them as an Orange then as a teetering team.


I tend to lean a little heavy on the college predictions during these updates, so I'll make this one a little more brief and give a bigger update next week on it.

Tennessee and Florida State.  Both of these teams had their 3rd loss of the season, so for anyone who thought there was a chance left, it went by the way side.

Stanford now has 3 losses in the PAC 12, which effectively ends their Conference championship hopes,

Here's a little one for you.  Georgia Southern and Lousiana-Lafayette have both been sucking ass in the Sun Belt, so let's red them out for Jim, Gary, and I.

That's about it there for now.


A subtle note of the playoffs in the air

Shawn 6-2
Jim 6-2

They're both 6-2 in a year where 7-6 looks like it's going to be good enough to get into the playoffs. Two more wins should do it.

The feeling good but could be feeling better group.

Colin 5-3
Rob 5-3
Joe 5-3

Each team is above .500 and in pretty decent shape at the moment.

The Even Stevens:

Gary 4-4
Geiss 4-4

What else can you say

Help Me

Hale 3-5
Adam 3-5
Munez 3-5
Eplin 3-5

We could all use a win, 4-5 puts you in position for a stretch run.  3-6 puts you in win or go home mode.

Shoot Me

Folden 1-7

Just get a couple wins to help with the overall standings.  His season is done.

Week 9 Schedule

Gary 4-4 vs Folden 1-7

Gary needs this one.  At one point Gary was 3-1 and has been sliding ever since.  This is a good spot to get back on track.

Rob 5-3 vs Munez 3-5

Munez put an absolute pounding on Gary last week.  His receiving core is strong and at full strength.  He needs to make some waiver wire glory to be able to put up another big number. Rob has bye  week problems of his own.  David Johnson and Lamar Miller are both on Bye.  Other than that, he has a pretty decent lineup, albeit no bench.

Adam 3-5 vs Geiss 4-4

Geiss is back from the dead, I said Good Looorrddd.  3 wins in a row and he comes ready to step on my throat and send me back to the woodshed.  This is a seperation game for Geiss, as a win here pushes a 3-5 team back further and puts him in a playoff push.

Hale 3-5 vs Eplin 3-5

Talk about a go big or go home week.  Eplin is at the bottom of the league in points so, a tie breaker scenario looks bad for him.  Hale needs his team to get healthy quick.  Eplin's in an...ok situation right now.  his team is fucked on byes in week 11, so he needs to get back to .500 in the next two weeks.

Jim 6-2 vs Joe 5-3

This is the War of Attricion Battle.  They are a combined 5 games over .500 despite being 9th and 8th in scoring this year.  I predict this game score ends up somewhere around 30-29 or so.


Shawn 6-2 vs Colin 6-2

Oh Baby, oh mercy.  This is a bush burner.  This is a stick your tongue in her fart box matchup.  The two highest scoring teams in the league do BATTLE. There projection is within a point of each other. LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE.

I was going to do a point update, but man, I wrote a lot today and didn't get a lot of work done.  AHHHHHHHHHHHH.  Til next week.  FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT! 

Tuesday, October 25, 2016

10-25 Update: All Hallows Eve Edition

Welcome to a super spooky, out of this world edition of Football God: Update.  Hope you brough your iron will, and your worst fears.


This week in the Ghoul Pool, Geiss met his untimely demise, as the (choke choke) Falcons lost to Laser Face and the rest of the Chargers.

This leaves Rob and I without a strike.  Hale, Folden, and Joe with one strike a piece.  Keep in mind that people get 10 points for making through Week 9.  Two more weeks before the Ghoul Pool starts to pay out.

College Pick'em

This past week I took a real slashing in the standings.  I was mauled over.  I shrieked when I saw the results, and I'm scared of the future.  Enough heavy handed Halloween references though.

After putting up solid numbers and building up a good lead all year, I managed to get 4 out of 16.  Joe and Gary took mad advantage of my let down, putting up 13 and 12 respectfully.

This week has tightened up the standings as now my lead has shrank to just 2 over Joe, 3 over Folden, 4 over Colin, and 5 over Gary.

Professional Pick'em

Geiss and Joe maintained a solid 8 this week, which keeps them tied for the lead.  This allowed about half of the league to pick up some ground on them one way or the other.

There lead sits at 2 over Eplin and 3 over Colin and Folden.  Big ups to Jim this week for not making his pro picks.  He's heading to John McLane territory here.

Gary got the bonus this week, putting up 22. Way to go Yingst.


Not too much to go over here.  Ohio State took their first loss of the year, which would normally put them in trouble for the College Football Playoff.  But, the douchebags that vote on the polls had them drop a solid 4 spots about losing to an unranked team.  So...whatever...Must be nice.

Other than that Michigan's joke of a schedule ha put them solidly in the number 2 spot.

Interestingly, Houston has lost it's 2nd conference game of the season, putting them in desperation mode, as far as winning their conference goes.  Sadly, no one had the stones to be against them, so it's sort of a moot point.

Fantasy Football

Week 7 is in the books.  Here's where we stand.

Shawn 5-2
Colin 5-2
Rob 5-2
Jim 5-2
Gary 4-3
Joe 4-3
Hale 3-4
Adam 3-4
Geiss 3-4
Munez 2-5
Eplin 2-5
Folden 1-6

I actually predicted the correct outcome of all the games last week.  So...bully for me.

Week 8 Schedule

Joe (4-3) vs Adam (3-4)

My squad has been up and down all year.  I put up a big number against Colin, while Colin put up a yuge number.  Joe has been steady as she goes.  On pace for a play off.  runs into a couple of match up issues this week, and Lev Bell is on bye.  Gronk has decided to start gronking off though.  I see a let down week for Joe.

Prediction:  Adam 112 Joe 101

Shawn 5-2 vs Folden 1-6

Poor Folden.  Team put up so numbers this past week and he still couldn't pull it off.  After a Week 1 win, Folden is sporting a sweet 6 game losing streak.  He's going against Shawn who is in 1st place in the league.  I mean, it's a lot more fun to pick upsets.  But, I just can't do it this week.

Prediction: Shawn 123 Folden 96

Rob 5-2 vs Eplin 2-5

Talk about another sorry team.  Eplin has had to deal with many players hitting the IR, and this week he barely has enough able-bodied running backs to field a lineup.  Rob has David Johnson, who basically jizzes on faces on a weekly basis. This game stinks of a blow out.


UPSET ALERT:  Eplin's officially hit the point where names don't matter for shit.  He's throwing his best case lineup in the middle of a worst case scenario.  I think he's down by double digits heading ot Monday, and Asiata brings the Big Ups to put him over the top.

Eplin 111 Rob 109

Gary 4-3 vs Munez 2-5

Tough sledding for Munez this week.  Put into a tough spot with 6 of his players on bye and 1 of them announcing his RETIREMENT, Munez literally has to start everyone that's playing but his backup QB.

I think Gary's got the goods to go this week.  Sorry Munez

Prediction:  Gary 85 Munez 78.

Jim 5-2 vs Colin 5-2

Usually a 5-2 vs 5-2 game gets top billing, but we're all about the unconventional this spooky season.  We'll make this one simple.  Colin's at full force and his team is one to reckon with.  mouth fucking all the way around.

Prediction: Colin 145 Jim 117

 Game of the Week

Geiss 3-4 Vs Hale 3-4

No game has a more guaranteed effect on the standings this week then Hale and Geiss.  Hale's team is full of backup running backs, Green Bay packers, and hurt players  Geiss is nearly at full steam, although without Beckham.  his squad is on a big up swing at the moment and I like it to continue.

Geiss 133 Hale 109

So, that's it for the week.  remember to check to make sure that your candy and condoms don't have holes poked in the wrapper.

Happy Halloween.  From Jay Cutler.

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

Update 10/18: Bathe in the Blood

What's up wanks.   Time to hit it.


Well, last week was a bloodbath.  Last week I predicted that 2 of the 3 of us would get our 1st strike and 3 people would be eliminated.  I underestimated that a little.

Munez, Colin, Eplin, Jim, and Shawn were all elimanted picking Pittsburgh.  So, Gary has been joined all of a sudden by 5 other people.
Joe gained his first strike as well, banking on Pittsburgh.

Geiss, Hale, and Folden stayed alive, picking Tennessee.

Rob & I took Buffalo to remain the last two who are strikeless 6 weeks into the season. On another note, I looked back to last year.  And, I have now gone 17 consecutive weeks without a strike, dating back to Week 2 of last season.  Fuckin aye.  Knocking on wood for this one.



Tennessee got spanked by Alabama this weekend, giving them their 2nd consecutive loss and pushing them out of the National Title picture (most likely)

Also, UCLA has fallen to 1 and 3 in the Pac 12, meaning they are likely out of the Pac 12 Championship picture.  Eplin is just....He's really taking a beating in the predictions right now.


Folden was able to score 10 last week ahead of a few that had 9.  Colin only scored 7, dropping him into 3rd.

Overall,  I am in the lead with 78, Folden is 4 back at 74, and Colin is at 71.


Folden and Rob both tied with 12 points this week, giving Folden the bonus in the pick'em.

Overall, Geiss and Joe hold the lead in the pick'em, with Folden a point behind.  1st and 11th in the pro pick'em are only seperated by 7 points.  Hale is way back, 14 behind.


Here are the points scored in the pick'em bonus so far this year.

Folden 30
Colin 20
Joe 20
Adam 15
Eplin 10


Last night was pretty wild for our league.  David Johnson put up 37 points for Rob, helping him eek out Shawn by less than a point for the win.

Brandon Marshall brought Folden within a point of me in the first half, only to not touch the ball again.

Carson Palmer through a TD pass to Michael Floyd in the 4th quarter that put not only Gary on top of Eplin, but also Munez ahead of Jim.

Now six weeks in, here are the standings.

Shawn 4-2
Rob 4-2
Colin 4-2
Gary 4-2
Jim 4-2
Hale 3-3
Joe 3-3
Adam 3-3
Geiss 2-4
Munez 2-4
Eplin 2-4
Folden 1-5

All of our 4-1 teams lost, while two of our 1-4 teams won.  Tie breakers aside, there are only 2 games between 1st and 11th in the league.  So where do we go from here?


Adam (3-3) vs Colin (4-2)
Colin has hit a rougher part of his schedule, with bye weeks hitting him hard.  He has Kelvin Benjamin and Ezekiel Elliott out this week on Bye, giving my inferior squad an advantage.  I'm going for my 4th win in a row.

Prediction: Colin 115 Adam 103

Folden (1-5) vs Jim (4-2)
Jim finally gets some running backs into his lineup this week, and his team is looking more formidable then it did the last couple of weeks, Folden is trying to get on the winning track of things after suffering his 5th straight loss.  This one should be close.  Jim's team has had a couple of rough weeks.

Prediction:  Jim 91 Folden 88

Hale (3-3) vs Joe (3-3)
Hale has won his 3rd straight game, but plays Joe without Cam Newton in his lineup this week.  This opens the door for Joe, who i seeing his team finally get back to full strength.  With Landry Jones at QB, you can only expect Leveon Bell to carry the ball at least 300 times.

Prediction Joe 120 Hale 105

Geiss (2-4) vs Eplin (2-4)

Eplin's team continues to try to find it's footing.  A lot of high draft picks not living up to potential are hurting him this year.  Geiss is coming off of a YUGE game from ODB.  Add in TY Hilton and Edelman, Geiss may have the most dangerous receiving core in the league.  Whoever wins this game will be only 1 game out of the playoff race.  So mark this as a big'un for both squads.

Prediction Geiss 117 Eplin 83

Munez 2-4 vs Shawn 4-2

Munez comes into this game a pretty big underdog to Shawn based off of the projections.  Shawn's team is a well oiled machine at this point, with big point potential from most of his roster.  I'm predicting a bigger week from Munez's backs though and I think this game is going to be close.  If Munez could get a living breathing receiver into his lineup I think he actually could win too.  But, as it stands.

Prediction Shawn 135 Munez 122

Rob 4-2 vs Gary 4-2
Gary and Rob come in with good records and a game that's projection is only a point apart.  Gary is dealing with his stud TE on Bye and a couple of tough matchups.  Rob's RB's nearly scored 100 points last week so what the hell.  I think Gary's team takes a powder this week, and gets ready for the rest of the season.
Rob 126 Gary 91


Might as well throw the totals in while we're at it.

Fantasy wins (10 pts apiece) + college pick'em + pro Pick'em + pick'em bonus = Total

Rob 40+61+55=
Shawn 40+66+52=
Jim 40+58+52=
Gary 40+65+52=
Colin 40+71+54+(20)
Hale 30+64+44=
Adam 30+78+51+(15)=
Joe 30+67+58+(20)=
Eplin 20+67+55+(10)=
Munez 20+66+51=
Geiss 20+64+58=
Folden 10+74+57+(30)=

1. Colin 185
2. Joe 175
3. Adam 174
4. Folden 171
5. Shawn 158
6. Gary 157
7. Rob 156
8. Eplin 152
9. Jim 150
10. Geiss 142
11. Hale 138
12. Munez 137

I'll try to get another point update in the first week of November.  Until then, munch on shit.

Thursday, October 13, 2016

10-13 Update: Rise of the Undeserved

What's up partners.  Back with another erection inducing update for you guys to swallow.


Oh me, oh my.  There were a couple of interesting matchups this past week.

Eplin was able to topple Joe despite only scoring 85 points and keeping a man who didn't play in his lineup.  I mark this win UNDESERVED.

Jim on the other hand, dealing with injuries and bye weeks made a great pick up of Artmis-Payne, who scored 2 suprising touchdowns.  Jim also forgot to actually put Artmis-Payne into his lineup, meaning his RB1 and RB2 on the week scored less than 1 point.  But, Rob's team laid a big egg, despite David Johnson putting up 36 points.  Jim's win is UNDESERVED.

Seriously guys, let's get our lineups straight.

In other games, I squeeked by Munez by 5 points moving me to 2-3 and Munez to 1-4.

Hale beat Folden to move to 2-3.

Our two most interesting games though came down to Monday night.

Colin needed every thing Mike Evans could offer before finally pulling ahead of Geiss in the 3rd quarter of the Monday Night game.

Gary and Shawn's game came down to the last drive of the game.  Jaquizz Rogers and Greg Olson both put up big numbers leading to about 8 lead changes in their game throughout the night.  Shawn pulled it out in the end though.

Here are your standings through 5 weeks.

Colin 4-1
Shawn 4-1
Jim 4-1

Gary 3-2
Rob 3-2
Joe 3-2

Hale 2-3
Adam 2-3
Eplin 2-3

Geiss 1-4
Folden 1-4
Munez 1-4

I appreciate the symmetry that our standings have brought us yet again.

So, what lies ahead in Week 6?

Munez 1-4 vs Jim 4-1
Munez needs a win badly, and is matched up against the continually prevailing Jim.  Jim's been on the right side of luck so far, and it maybe the coin flips this week in Munez's direction.  Their projections for the week are less than 0.25 of a point apart.

Gary 3-2 vs Eplin 2-3
If we had a Survivor Pool for fantasy, my pick would be Gary this week.  Eplin's Rb's are all hurt, and even if they don't play theree's a chance that he keeps them in his lineup anyway.

Geiss 1-4 vs Joe 3-2
Geiss is in a fuck I need to win now situation just like the rest of the 1-4 teams.  Geiss, unfortunately, is going against Joe in a week, where he's projected to put up 123 points.  Yikes.

Adam 2-3 vs Folden 1-4
Folden comes in a 20 point underdog this week.  He has a lot of question marks at RB, but a lot of studs at WR.  His team is sort of a boom or bust on a weekly basis here.

Rob 3-2 vs Shawn 4-1
Rob is trying to mitigate two bad performances from his team in a row, while Shawn's team continues to fly high.  Both of these squads are impressive and should be playoff teams.  Maybe this is a preview of a playoff matchup?

Game of the Week
Hale 2-3 vs Colin 4-1
While Hale is only 2-3 his team is actually 4th in points scored this year.  He has the most points against this season and is actually projected to beat Colin this week. Colin has target monster Mike Evans on bye, and Elliott is facing the Packers run defense who has only given up like 170 yards ALL SEASON.  Coln's best asset is his depth, so he can usually run out a formidable lineup.

Hale's biggest issue is that just about every one of his starters is questionable for this weekend.  If they all play, I think I like him this weekend.  Interesting game for sure though.


Last week was basically the equivalent of a bye week for everyone in the Survivor Pool.  10 of the 11 of us took New England, save for Geiss who had already used them.  He took Pittsburgh and nobody really had to sweat it out.

Week 6 should be much more interesting.  Joe, Rob, and I remain strikeless.  The other 8 people all have one strike.  This is a week, in which, there are no really clear teams to take, and as people keep using the best of the best, it starts to get murkier.  I'm going to make a prediction that by the end of this week, there is only 1 team without a strike, and 3 people have been eliminated.


Last week,  Colin and Folden were able to outscore me by 1 point, and pick up a game.  Eplin took the week with 9 points.

Overall, I have a 5 point lead over Colin and Folden.  Everyone else is at least 10 points back.

In the Pro pick'em Joe put up an 11 point week. Joe now leads the pro pick'em by 1 over Geiss and by 4 over like 5 people.

Colin was able to win the pick'em bonus with 18 points, Joe and Eplin right behind at 17.


Congrats, Stanford.  You stink pal.

Blandford's 2nd loss in a row knocks them out final four contention.  This put a red mark against gary Rob, and Jim, the first final four team to get eliminated for each of them.

That was also Gary's National Champion runner-up.

Stanford isn't quite out of the Pac 12 yet, although their chances are clearly looking bad. The two teams in front of them are Washington and Washington State, both of the teams they lost to.  They'd basically need to win out in the Pac 12 and hope those teams fell apart.

Tennessee also lost, which obviously isn't a big help for their final four hopes, there is still a chance for them.  They play Alabama this week.  A win here helps their chances.

No point update this week.  Later bitches.

Tuesday, October 4, 2016

10-4, First Point Update

What up, Swine.  4 weeks into the year, so I figured I'd do a more comprehensive update so that people can see how they're doing.

College Predictions

Florida State, more like Dunzo State, am I right?

Florida State dripped their diarrhea all over the place this weekend, losing to UNC and officially ending their National Championship (and probably their ACC) hopes.  They have two loses, and would need to hope Clemson somehow loses two games, and that Louisville loses two.  They would also need to win out, which seems awfully unlikely.

That's an official loss for Me, Voyten, and Eplin's National Championship runner up.  We're joined by Folden and Munez as far as our final four is concerned.

Stanford took a big step towards the pool of loneliness and despair by getting their asses spanked by the Huskies of Washington.  While Stanford isn't officially out of the Final Four conversation, they are teetering.  Even winning out wouldn't necessarily put them in.  Although that non conference game against Rice at the end of the season could redeem them (sarcasm).

There haven't really been enough conference games to get into much of anything else at the moment.
Pro Predictions

We're at the quarter poll and a few things are becoming pretty clear.

#1.  The AFC South is a trash can full of disease and feces.
The Colts, Jags, and Titans all suck, but with Houston losing their best (only) chance of winning, it seems like anybody could pull ahead there.

#2  Anybody who didn't take the Browns as a bottom 3 team (Hale, Eplin) has made a huge mistake.

#3  The Cardinals and the Panthers both suck garbage, and the Broncos could continue winning with me as their quarterback right now.

#4  People who had JJ Watt as their Sacks leader are done, and those of us (most of us) who had Khalil Mack can enjoy him being on pace for a total of 4 sacks this year.

#5  Geiss's bold pick of the Raiders would look good, if Denver could somehow lose a game.  Impressively for the Raiders though, they are 3-0 on the road so far.  Meaning they have 7 home games out of their 12 games left.

#6  Eplin being the only person to chose Julio Jones to win the Receiving title took a big step forward when he put up 300 yards on Sunday.

Survivor Pool

After last week's blood bath, things were mostly calm in the Survivor Pool this week.  Eplin's Broncos won easily, The Bengals took it to Miami for most of us, and Washington struggled, but eventually pulled away from Cleveland for the rest of us.

Jim took the interesting strategy used by Folden last year, in which he didn't pick a team.  That's one strike for Jim.  It didn't work for Folden last year, let's see if it works better for Jimmy.

That leaves Myself, Joe, and Rob without a strike, everyone else with 1 strike, and Gary sitting at home alone.


Folden won the Week 5 bonus by winning college and finishing in 2nd in the pro pick'em.

Overall,  I hold a 6 point lead over Colin and Folden.  Everyone else is behind 9 to 14 points.

In the Pro Pick'em  Geiss holds a 1 point lead over Folden and Joe, 2 over Gary and Eplin, and the rest of us are behind that.

Fantasy Football

It's a strange world we live in today.  There are six 3-1 teams and six 1-3 teams now.

Every single 2-1 and 0-3 team won last week.  While all the 3-0 and 1-2 teams lost.

The Week 5 Schedule works out like this

Jim 3-1 vs Rob 3-1
Shawn 3-1 vs Gary 3-1
Colin 3-1 vs Geiss 1-3
Joe 3-1 vs Eplin 1-3
Hale 1-3 vs Folden 1-3
Adam 1-3 vs Munez 1-3

So, we're guarenteed to have two 4-1 teams, two 3-2 teams, two 2-3 teams, and two 1-4 teams next week.  I think I like Geiss over Colin in an upset special.

Point Totals

Here are the totals up to now.  Scores go like this.  10 points for a fantasy win + College pick'em + Pro Pick'em + (bonus points).

Rob 30+48+33
Colin 30+56+35+(10)
Joe 30+52+38+(15)
Jim 30+48+35
Shawn 30+51+34
Gary 30+51+37
Adam 10+62+33+(15)
Hale 10+53+30
Geiss 10+50+39
Munez 10+51+33
Folden 10+56+38+(20)
Eplin 10+50+37+(5)

Joe 135
Colin 131
Folden 124
Adam 120
Gary 118
Shawn 115
Jim 113
Rob 111
Eplin 102
Geiss 99
Munez 94
Hale 93

I realize it's very very early and the winner will have 7 to 8 times more points then we have now, but there is something a little gratifying about the guy who made his team name All Hale The Champ, being in dead last.

Until next time, eat shit.

Thursday, September 29, 2016

9/29 Update

This is going to be quick, I don't feel like doing this today.


Colin, Rob, and Gary improved to 3-0.

Shawn, Jim and Joe are at 2-1

Folden, Eplin, and Munez are at 1-2

Me, Geiss, and Hale at 0-3.


Colin won the pick'em bonus of 10 points.

Overall, I have a 5 point lead over Colin in the College Pick'em, 6 point over Folden, and 7 over Munez.

Pro Pick'em, Joe has a 1 point lead over Geiss, 2 point lead over Eplin and Folden, and 3 point lead over Colin, Shawn, and Gary.

Survivor Pool

Last Week, Munez got a strike for picking Houston.  Hale a strike for picking Pittsburgh, and Geiss, Colin, Folden, and Gary a strike for picking Arizona.

That's also Gary's 2nd strike.  Last year he finished in 11th, this year 12th.  Good job on Survivor Pool, Gary.

Three weeks into the season, and Joe, Rob, Jim and I are the only ones without a strike so far.


Jim vs Gary
Shawn vs Eplin
Rob vs Adam
Hale vs Munez
Colin vs Joe
Munez vs Folden

I might do a point update next week.  although they're pretty irrelevant til November.  Lates fucks.

Wednesday, September 21, 2016

9/21/2016 Mini Update

What up, Fucks.  Week 3 of Football God is in the books and we're gonna go through a recap.


Folden and Joe both put up 21 points this week, giving them the 10 point bonus.  Joe put up 11 in a tough week of college, while Folden put up 13 dick pounding points, coming back from the brink of the abyss to snag those sweet sweet bonus points.

Overall,  I have a 4 point lead over Folden and Joe in the college; and, Folden keeps a 1 point lead over Joe in the Pro.  Lots of dick left to suck though before the overall standings really mean anything.


BANG BANG.  Eplin and Shawn took one of the chin this week, each taking those Turd Sandwiches from Seattle who lost to the Not St Louis Rams.

Eplin, Shawn, and Gary hang off the edge of the mountain, clinging to their life, calling for help.  But, noone is coming to help.  Either hold on for the long ride, or plummet into the darkness, never to be heard from again....at least until next season.


Colin, Voyten, Gary,a nd Rob are off to great 2-0 starts.  Jim, Joe, Eplin, and Folden are at 1-1.  Hale, Geiss, Munez, and I are stuck in the muck and the mire, trying to slog forward, only to move backward at 0-2.

This week's games.

Rob 2-0 vs Hale 0-2
Geiss 0-2 vs Munez 0-2
Joe1-1 vs Folden 1-1
Eplin 1-1 vs Colin 2-0
Jim 1-1 vs Voyten 2-0
Adam 0-2 vs Gary 2-0


HOLY SHIT.  I red out people's predictions out when they are extremely unlikely to impossible to take place.  And, my god did Oklahoma out do itself in shittiness.

3 weeks in and they are DONE.

That's a redmark for Eplin and Hale's National Championship.  Folden's runner up.  And a final four team for Me, Folden, Joe, Geiss, Hale, and Eplin.

Obviously, there's still plenty of ball to play, and every other team could decide to audibly fart as hard as the "Not gonna happen very 'Soon'ers," but it's safe to say they are pretty much butt fucked to mediocrity.  Obvs, they are still in the Big 12 race, since that hasn't even happened yet.

Florida State took a powder last Saturday too, getting beat by 248 by Louisville.  In the immortal words of early 2000's musical abortion Linkin Park, Florida State is one step closer to the edge, and they're about to break.

Florida State could still sneak into the final four if they win out tough games @ south Florida and Miami, and home games against UnC, Clemson, and Florida; And, they'd need Louisville to lose twice (they play Houston and Clemson still).  So, for now I've got them yellowed out, meaning basically they can fuck all they want, but they might not get to cum.

That would basically fuck Eplin's national championship game completely.  While fucking me and Voyten's runner up.  As well as many people's final four.

The only 3 people who haven't suffered a final four team loss yet are Jim, Rob, and Scary Gary.

I'm gonna leave you guys with the immortal words of Colonel Sanders.  "I'm too drunk to taste this chicken."

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Week 2 Update

Just a short update to let ya'll know where we stand on a couple of things.

Pick'em point bonus.

In Week 1 I earned the 5 point bonus by predicting 15 out of 18

Week 2's 10 point bonus was earned by Me, Joe, and Eplin with 27 correct a piece.

Eplin had 18 college 9 Pro, 17 and 10 for me, and 16 and 11 for Joe.

Survivor Pool

Who would get struck first?  Gary was the only person to take a strike in week 1 of the season, picking the Colts to beat the Lions.

Eplin had Houston who overcame a slow start to get the job done.

Munez had the Packers who sweated out a late rally by the Jags.

Shawn had KC who had to come back from 18 down to beat the Chargers in OT.

The rest of us had Seattle who were losing until a TD sealed it in the final seconds of the season.

Otherwise, things were fairly standard throughout the league.  No big upsets in college football.

Fantasy Football

Fantasy Week 1 showed the following results:

Jim defeated me to start the defense of his Football God and Fatasy Championship.

Shawn scored the most points in the week beating Hale.

Gary rode Deangelo Williams and Antonio Brown to come back on Geiss despite Kenan Allen's injury.

Rob took advantage of Joe's 2nd rate starting line up.

Colin started off strong beating Munez.

Folden won the least deserving victory of the week, putting up 85 points and defeating Eplin's 80.

That's it for now scumbags.

Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Pro Prediction Reveal

The time has come to see our future failures.

Super Bowl Champions

Our Superbowl predictions were represented by 3 NFC teams and 2 AFC teams

The Steelers (for the first time ever) were the leading team in Football God with 5 predictions.  That brings out big time Big Ben Rapelisberger face.

The Arizona Cardinals were close behind with 4.  Other than that we had 1 each for the Packers, the Pats, and the Panthers.

In the Superbowl participants the Steelers also led the way with 9 people picking them to represent the AFC.  The only three that didn't have them were Myself, Hale, and Folden all with New England.

In the NFC it's more of a mixed bag.  Four people had Arizona in the Superbowl, three Carolina, three Greenbay, and two Seattle.

The AFC & NFC Championship game losers are a mixed bag of those 6 teams, with the exception of Hale and Eplin having Denver as the AFC Championship game loser.


Half the divisions this year are piss pour diarrhea as far as parody goes.

The divisions highlighted in yellow are the AFC & NFC north, the AFC East and the NFC South.  Everyone chose the Panthers, Packers, Pats, and Steelers for obvious reasons, so let's move on from there.


This was pretty even across the way, with 6 people choosing Houston and 5 Luck, and the Brocks.
people choosing Indi.  I chose Jacksonville, and while Jalen Ramsey, Blake Bortles, and I are cigars with lit $100 bills laughing, the rest of you chumps can enjoy your picks of the ultimate fuck faced Andrew

In other news, Andrew Luck was named the most butt ugly human on earth for the 25th year in a row.

Geiss's Marbles

Most people took KC in the NFL's first Peyton Manningless season.  Three people took Denver, which I stayed away from.  Mainly because they're starting a guy at QB who I've never even heard of.  That's a rare feat.  Geiss stepped up big and had the balls to take the Oakland Raiders.  Love the ballsy pick.  Most people probably considered it at some point, I know I did.


I assume that this division was probably more varied before Tony Romo crumpled to the ground in a fit of lady-like back pain, but 3 people still managed to pull the trigger on them.  Most people rolled the dice on the Giants, which is fine.  A couple of people took Washington too.

Truth is the NFC East is pretty much just a war of which team can fuck up the least.  It's basically just pull up your jock, go out there and try not to fuck up.  Nothing glamorous,  nothing sexy, just don't fuck up.  Probably lead to Eli and his dumb fetus face getting another Super Bowl ring somehow.

God I hate his fucking face.  His stupid fucking faggot face.


7 votes for Seattle, 5 for Arizona.  Amazingly 4 people have Arizona winning the Superbowl and only 1 more has them winning their own division.  People are either very hot or very cold on them this year.


The Wildcards are all over the place this year, here is the breakdown.

KC 1

That's 10 different teams represented, no team having more than 5 picks.

So who are the losers who noone picked?  Let's have a quick in memorium for the jerk offs.


The NFC Wildcard isn't as varied as the AFC but still  has a few in there.

Arizona 6
Tampa Bay 5
Minnesota 5
Seattle 4
Washington 2
Atlanta  1
Dallas 1

Only 7 teams are represented here.

Here are the sorry sacks of shit that got no love from any of us this year.

That's New Orleans at their best.

Today while I was driving to the gym I saw an old woman (70+) wearing a custom St. Louis Rams jersey that said #11 Rock Solid on the back.

That was cool.

Obv, I'm not going to go through the individual awards and the other shit, because I'm tired and horny.  

See yinz at the draft later.  

Let's have a blast this year!