What up, Swine. 4 weeks into the year, so I figured I'd do a more comprehensive update so that people can see how they're doing.
Florida State, more like Dunzo State, am I right?
Florida State dripped their diarrhea all over the place this weekend, losing to UNC and officially ending their National Championship (and probably their ACC) hopes. They have two loses, and would need to hope Clemson somehow loses two games, and that Louisville loses two. They would also need to win out, which seems awfully unlikely.
That's an official loss for Me, Voyten, and Eplin's National Championship runner up. We're joined by Folden and Munez as far as our final four is concerned.
Stanford took a big step towards the pool of loneliness and despair by getting their asses spanked by the Huskies of Washington. While Stanford isn't officially out of the Final Four conversation, they are teetering. Even winning out wouldn't necessarily put them in. Although that non conference game against Rice at the end of the season could redeem them (sarcasm).
There haven't really been enough conference games to get into much of anything else at the moment.
We're at the quarter poll and a few things are becoming pretty clear.
#1. The AFC South is a trash can full of disease and feces.
The Colts, Jags, and Titans all suck, but with Houston losing their best (only) chance of winning, it seems like anybody could pull ahead there.
#2 Anybody who didn't take the Browns as a bottom 3 team (Hale, Eplin) has made a huge mistake.
#3 The Cardinals and the Panthers both suck garbage, and the Broncos could continue winning with me as their quarterback right now.
#4 People who had JJ Watt as their Sacks leader are done, and those of us (most of us) who had Khalil Mack can enjoy him being on pace for a total of 4 sacks this year.
#5 Geiss's bold pick of the Raiders would look good, if Denver could somehow lose a game. Impressively for the Raiders though, they are 3-0 on the road so far. Meaning they have 7 home games out of their 12 games left.
#6 Eplin being the only person to chose Julio Jones to win the Receiving title took a big step forward when he put up 300 yards on Sunday.
After last week's blood bath, things were mostly calm in the Survivor Pool this week. Eplin's Broncos won easily, The Bengals took it to Miami for most of us, and Washington struggled, but eventually pulled away from Cleveland for the rest of us.
Jim took the interesting strategy used by Folden last year, in which he didn't pick a team. That's one strike for Jim. It didn't work for Folden last year, let's see if it works better for Jimmy.
That leaves Myself, Joe, and Rob without a strike, everyone else with 1 strike, and Gary sitting at home alone.
Folden won the Week 5 bonus by winning college and finishing in 2nd in the pro pick'em.
Overall, I hold a 6 point lead over Colin and Folden. Everyone else is behind 9 to 14 points.
In the Pro Pick'em Geiss holds a 1 point lead over Folden and Joe, 2 over Gary and Eplin, and the rest of us are behind that.
It's a strange world we live in today. There are six 3-1 teams and six 1-3 teams now.
Every single 2-1 and 0-3 team won last week. While all the 3-0 and 1-2 teams lost.
The Week 5 Schedule works out like this
Jim 3-1 vs Rob 3-1
Shawn 3-1 vs Gary 3-1
Colin 3-1 vs Geiss 1-3
Joe 3-1 vs Eplin 1-3
Hale 1-3 vs Folden 1-3
Adam 1-3 vs Munez 1-3
So, we're guarenteed to have two 4-1 teams, two 3-2 teams, two 2-3 teams, and two 1-4 teams next week. I think I like Geiss over Colin in an upset special.
Here are the totals up to now. Scores go like this. 10 points for a fantasy win + College pick'em + Pro Pick'em + (bonus points).
I realize it's very very early and the winner will have 7 to 8 times more points then we have now, but there is something a little gratifying about the guy who made his team name All Hale The Champ, being in dead last.
Until next time, eat shit.