Thursday, December 31, 2009

Last Week for Pick 'em

Hey guys, I just wanted to update people on the Pick 'Em score because this is the last week for it. I'll get a full update in on Saturday.

Pro Pick 'Em (college Pick 'Em in parenthesis)

Jim 164 (128)
Colin 161 (134)
Rob 157 (126)
Geiss 157 (130)
Folden 156 (141)
Voyten 154 (124)
Joe 153 (135)
Andrew 152 (144)
Adam 148 (146)
Munez 146 (134)

Folden 297
Andrew 296
Colin 295
Adam 294
Jim 292
Joe 288
Geiss 283
Rob 283
Munez 280
Voyten 278

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Week 15 bitches

sorry for the delays, I've been busy as fuck. went to albany for work and then punched the bear all weekend. i hope u guys understand. So Voyten clinched the playoffs, now it's he and the glove in for sure. Geiss is all but 100 % for sure too, so look forward to Geiss vs Voyten in the first round of the playoffs, and Munez vs Folden/Rob/Colin in the first round.

Interesting stat about our league, Joe is 3rd in points for the season, but in 7th place. Colin is 9th in points this season but in 4th place. Geiss has outscored Colin by nearly 300 points, and they have the same record. Wings had some good songs in the 70' take me down, to the streets.

The way it's going to go is pretty simple, if Colin wins, he's in. If Colin loses and Rob wins, then he's in. If they both lose, and Folden wins, then he's in.

Pick 'em (shout out to Munez for waiting until Sunday night to make any picks)

Pro Pick 'em (college added to the right)

Jim 144 + 128 = 272
Colin 142 + 134 = 276
Geiss 136 + 130 = 266
Rob 136 + 126 = 262
Voyten 135 + 124 = 259
Folden 135 + 141 = 276
Joe 134 + 135 = 269
Andrew 133 + 144 = 277
Adam 130 + 146 = 276
Munez 128 + 134 = 262

So the ranking is
Andrew (0)
Adam (-1)
Folden (-1)
Colin (-1)
Jim (-5)
Joe (-8)
Geiss (-11)
Rob (-15)
Munez (-15)
Voyten (-18)

Munez basically forfeited his way out of this one. It's probably just between Me, Andrew, Colin, Folden, and Jimbo now, but Joe has an outside shot if he goes on a tear.
Here's the totals on the season.

Fantasy Bonus + College Predictions + Combined Pick 'em

Munez 110 + 300 + 262
Voyten 100 + 395 + 259
Geiss 80 + 350 + 266
Colin 80 + 265 + 276
Folden 70 + 280 + 276
Rob 70 + 140 + 262
Joe 60 + 400 + 269
Andrew 50 + 240 + 277
Jim 50 + 370 + 272
Adam 30 +430 + 276

And now, the current overall standings.

Voyten 754
Adam 736
Joe 729
Geiss 696
Jim 692
Munez 672
Folden 626
Colin 621
Andrew 567
Rob 470

Now, I realize that these predictions are extremely heavily weighted. I think that it's obvious that they should be ranked higher than pick 'em or a fantasy football game, but perhaps it's a little bit too high. I think next year it will serve us better to cut the pre season prediction points in half, straight down the line, I'd like some feedback on this. I'd also like some feedback on any other changes that people think we should have. We can all vote at the end of this season. I have some ideas, like making this a 2 or 3 player keeper league.

Also, there are some NFL predictions that could be counted right now, but I'm just going to wait until the regular season wraps up before I start counting them. Until next time, ladies. (adam shakes his hips like Val Venis while riding a jet ski)

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Week 14 Bukkake

So college predictions are in (save the Heisman trophy and bcs champion). Here's how they went.

I'll give the total points.

Adam 430 (210 conf champions, 120 points in conf champ games, 50 champ game, 50 bcs games)
Joe 400 (150 conf champ games, 50 champ game, 150 conf champs, 50 bcs games)
Voyten 395 (120 conf champ games, 75 bcs games, 150 conf champs, 50 bcs championship)
Jim 370 (90 conf champ games, 50 bcs champ game, 180 conf champs, 50 bcs champ game)
Geiss 350 (120 Conf champ games, 180 conf champs, 50 Bcs games)
Munez 300 (120 conf champs, 30 conf champ games, 100 conf champ, 50 bcs champ game)
Folden 280 (60 conf champ games, 120 conf champs, 50 bcs games, 50 bcs championship)
Colin 265 (75 conf champ games, 50 bcs games, 90 conf champs, 50 bcs champ game)
Andrew 240 (45 conf champ games, 50 bcs champ game, 25 bcs games, 120 conf champs)
Rob 140 (30 conf champ games, 60 conf champs, 50 bcs games)

Onto the pick 'em

College overall - Final standings

Adam 146
Andrew 144
Folden 141
Joe 135
Munez 134
Colin 134
Geiss 130
Jim 128
Rob 126
Voyten 124

Pro standings (save for sunday night and monday night game) with college scores next to it

Jim 133 (128)
Colin 128 (134)
Munez 127 (134)
Joe 123 (135)
Geiss 123 (130)
Rob 123 (128)
voyten 122 (126)
Andrew 122 (144)
Folden 122 (142)
adam 118 (146)

Totals for Pick 'em

Andrew 266
Adam 264
Folden 264
Colin 262
Jim 261
Munez 261
Joe 258
Geiss 253
Rob 251
Voyten 248

I realized that this week in fantasy football is UNDERDOG WEEK. The top 5 teams in the league are playing the bottom 5 teams in the league. I'll have detailed analysis tomorrow night or tuesday night along with the pick 'em totals after tonight and tomorrow's games. Things won't change that much from tonight, being that everybody picked minnesota tonight. So congrats Andrew, you're on top of the heap in the Pick 'em, with 4 weeks left.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Big Suprise, the Glove Wins Again

It was a thrilling day in the world of fantasy football last night. Munez, aka "the glove" clinched the first playoff spot of the year with his slim win over Folden. Drew Brees put together a pants cumming performance to slip my puck past Joe's goalie, eliminating his slim chance at making the playoffs. Colin beat Andrew 92-91 in what can only be compared to the Cleveland Browns vs the Buffalo Bills of not excitement. Rob finally overcame Geiss in the 4th quarter of last night's contenst to pull within a game of the playoffs, and Shawn beat Jim...nothing exciting there.

So where does this leave us? Well myself, Jim, and Joe are out of it, and Andrew and Folden are almost gone. They would need to win out, while getting some help from the people ahead of them. No it's really looking like it's just 5 teams fighting for 4 spots. By next week, things should be shaking out a little bit better. Next week's games look like this

Munez (best) vs Adam (worst) prediction Munez wins by so many points that I am forced to change my fantasy name to Kibbles and Vicks out of embarrassment.

Folden vs Colin & Andrew vs Rob- If Folden and Andrew are going to have any chance of making the playoffs it has to start here. If they can both win, that would tie the two of them up with Rob, and put them a game back of Colin with two games to play.

Jim vs Geiss - This is Jim's chance to play BCS Buster on the league. If Geiss wins here, he'll be in good shape. If he and Colin both lose, then when they play each other next week could be for a playoff spot.

Voyten vs Joe - Voyten's basically in, 1 more win in his next three will clinch it. Maybe it will be this week, maybe it won't.

So here are where the point bonus's are. and the pick 'em scores.

Munez - 100 + 253 = 353
Voyten - 90 + 235 = 325
Geiss - 70 + 244 = 314
Colin - 70 + 253 = 323
Rob - 60 + 242 = 302
Andrew - 50 + 254 = 304
Folden - 50 + 254 = 304
Jim - 40 + 250 = 290
Joe - 40 + 239 = 279
Adam - 30 + 256 = 286

Next week all of the College predicts will be in, aside for the national title and heisman trophy.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Week 12, check that, Week 13 update

Hey guys, sorry there was no update last week. With the holidays and shit, I never got around to it. I'm a bum, I don't know what else to say. I'll make up for it this week by giving some in depth analysis.

College Football. Ok, I'm going to through each person's pre season predictions for the conference championship games. The way they worked out were like this

Big 12 Championship

Nebraska vs Texas
predicted game exactly (45 points) - Adam, Joe, Voyten, Geiss
Got at least 1 team (15 Pts) - Jim, Folden, Andrew, Colin, Munez
Got neither (0 Pts) - Rob

ACC Championship

Georgia Tech vs Clemson

Predicted game exactly (45 pts) - nobody
Got at least 1 team right (15) - Voyten
Got neither (0) - everybody else

SEC Championship

Florida vs Alabama

Predicted Game Exactly (45) - Joe, Colin
Predicted 1 team correctly (15) - everybody else

MAC Championship Game

Central Michigan vs Ohio

Predicted game exactly (45) - nobody
Predicted 1 team correctly (15) - Adam, Jim, Geiss, Folden, Joe
Predicted neither (0) - Voyten, Rob, Munez, Colin, Andrew

Conference USA Championship Game

East Carolina vs Houston

Predicted game exactly (45) - Adam, Geiss, Jim, Voyten, Joe
Predicted one team correctly (15) Andrew, Folden, Rob, Colin
Predicted neither (0) Munez

So if you add that up, you get these totals

Joe - 150 pts
Adam 120
Geiss 120
Voyten 120
Jim 90
Colin 75
Folden 60
Andrew 45
Rob 30
Munez 30

Big ups go to Joe, who correctly predicted three games exactly right. Panty moistening foresight right there.

Next week, I'll have the totals for the Conference champion predictions as several are still up for grabs. Big ups also go to the Conferences for their scheduling this year. Aside from the 5 conference championship games this week, Oregon & Oregon St play each other for the PAC 10 title, and Cinci & Pitt play each other for the Big East title.

That means that as of right now only 4 of the 11 conferences have been decided. Those winners, so far, are TCU in the Mountain West, Ohio State in the Big 10, Boise in the WAC, and Troy St in the Sun Belt. The total updates for college will come next week.

College Pick 'Em

At one point this year, I was running through the college pick 'em at a rampant and insatiable pace. Well, I peaked too early, and now my lead has been knocked down to 1 point with one week left in the regular season. Our totals on the season.

Adam 142
Andrew 141
Folden 137
Colin 131
Munez 130
Joe 129
Geiss 127
Rob 125
Jim 124
Voyten 121

Congrats to Rob on getting out of the cellar here. It took awhile, but he's pulled himself up to 8th.

Next up, let's go to the NFL. Here are the pick 'em totals so far (without counting Pittsburgh game or NE & NO games).

Jim 125
Munez 121
Colin 121
Folden 117
Geiss 117
Rob 115
Adam 113
Voyten 112
Andrew 111
Joe 109

This coming off of Geiss having a ball hanging 12 out of 14 to go up the rung a little bit. Not much else changing though. Let's see what two weeks of no updates has done with the overall pick 'em total.

Adam 255
Folden 254
Andrew 252
Colin 252
Munez 251
Jim 249
Geiss 244
Rob 240
Joe 238
Voyten 233

This could change a tiny bit, depending on a couple of things. Joe, Folden, & Geiss picked Pittsburgh. So depending on how these games go, the scores could change a tiny bit.

So Indi clinched their division today. Without a doubt so much earlier, than you would think. That means that everybody will get points for that, aside for Munez, who didn't have Indi even in the playoffs, and Colin who had Tennessee winning that division.

It's official too, Geiss & Joe's prediction of Chicago to win the NFC North is now impossible. I believe that since Minnesota has the tie breaker over GB for winning their two head to head games, that Minnesota needs just one more victory & one more GB loss to clinch their division. It's official that Colin and Rob's pick of Carolina won't be winning their division. Rob also had them in the Super Bowl, and although it may still be mathematically possible for them to make the playoffs. It is a long to the 12th power shot.

In the AFC West it appears that the Cardinals are going to win their division again. The 49ers still have a shot, with a relatively easy schedule remaining, and one more game against the Cardinals still ahead. Seattle is all but out of it, 3 games out of first, with 5 remaining. This is good for Jim, Folden, Colin, Rob, & Joe, who each have Arizona winning that division.

In the NFC East not one of us had Dallas winning that division. They have a one game lead over Phili and a two game lead over NYG with 5 to play.

Everybody picked NE to win their division and they are well on their way of accomplishing that. In the AFC West San Diego has a 1 game lead over the Broncos, who finally regained their V card against the Giants. The Broncos are 7-4, a team that 6 out of the 10 of us had finishing in the worst three teams in the league this year.

The three worst teams in the NFL right now are Tampa Bay, Cleveland, & St. Louis who all sit at 1-10. I'll be back tomorrow or Tuesday with our overall totals so far for the season & Fantasy Football updates. Next weekend I'll tally up all of the College Football Preseason Predictions and let everybody know where they stand. Until then, smell ya later.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Week 11 Results

Ok, so as far as predictions go, I'm going to wait to add up anymore of those points until the college regular season ends. It's just a lot of math to do everyday week in and week out. So let's just put it like this, 6 of us are getting the points for Ohio State winning the Big 10. Jim and I are likely the only ones getting the points for the MWC, if TCU wins one of their last two games. Nobody is getting points for the PAC 10. That's it so far. Onto the pick 'ems.

College Football

Colin decided to abstain from the first 8 games of the day this week, and then decided to pick incorrectly on the next 8, scoring only 4 points for the week. Coming into this week, Colin was tied with me for the overall pick 'em lead. This hurt him pretty badly. Here are the totals.

Munez - 12
Geiss - 11
Rob - 11
Adam - 10
Andrew - 10
Jim - 9
Voyten - 9
Joe - 7
Folden - 7
Colin - 4


Adam 124
Andrew 118
Folden 117
Munez 113
Colin 112
Joe 111
Geiss 111
Jim 109
Voyten 106
Rob 104

Pro Pick 'em went like this, this week.

Munez 10
Rob 10
Voyten 10
Adam 9
Joe 9
Folden 9
Colin 9
Jim 7
Andrew 7
Geiss 6

On the season

Munez 99
Colin 98
Jim 98
Folden 94
Adam 92
Rob 92
Geiss 92
Voyten 89
Andrew 88
Joe 87

So the pick 'em total for the year now is

Adam 216
Munez 212
Folden 211
Colin 210
Jim 207
Andrew 206
Geiss 203
Joe 198
Rob 196
Voyten 195

In fantasy, my team failed miserably for the 8th time this season, giving Folden the victory. Andrew put up another huge day, winning again. Shawn took it to Rob handily. Jimbo squeezed it out against Colin. And The Glove went down to Geiss. This is Munez's first loss since the first week of the season, when he lost to Geiss. After that Munez went on a tear, finding a way to win against all other 8 of us. His only kryptonite left is Geiss. After 10 games in the season, less than 5 points seperates those too.

So fantasy bonus's look like this.

Munez 80
Voyten 70
Geiss 60
Colin 60
Andrew 50
Joe 40
Rob 40
Folden 40
Jim 40
Adam 20


Munez 292
Colin 270
Voyten 265
Geiss 263
Andrew 256
Folden 251
Jim 247
Joe 238
Adam 236
Rob 236

I'll give college prediction updates in 2 weeks

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

week 10 results part 2

Pro Pick 'em

Jim 91
Colin 89
Munez 89
Geiss 86
Folden 85
Adam 83
Rob 82
Andrew 81
Shawn 79
Joe 78

College & Pro Pick 'em score combined (this is where we are in order for the $20 prize)

Adam 114 + 83 = 197
Colin 108 + 89 = 197
Folden 110 + 85 = 195
Jim 100 + 91 = 191
Munez 89 + 101 = 190
Andrew 108 + 81 = 189
Geiss 100 + 86 = 186
Joe 104 + 78 = 182
Voyten 97 + 79 = 176
Rob 93 + 82 - 175

As of now, Colin and are tied...and we're queer it fits, unlike the glove.

Fantasy Football Bonus

Munez 80
Shawn 60
Colin 60
Geiss 50
Joe 40
Rob 40
Andrew 40
Jim 30
Folden 30
Adam 20 (gay)

Totals, the last number will indicate the bonus. Everybody but Joe and Colin got 15 points, those 2 got 45.

Colin 197 + 60 + 45 = 302
Munez 190 + 80 + 15 = 285
Joe 182 + 40 + 45 = 267
Voyten 176 + 60 + 15 = 251
Geiss 186 + 50 + 15 = 251
Andrew 189 + 40 + 15 = 244
Folden 195 + 30 + 15 = 240
Jim 191 + 30 + 15 = 236
Adam 197 + 20 + 15 = 232
Rob 175 + 40 + 15 = 230

Congrats Colin, you are the top of the heap.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

week 10 results - let's get to this one nice and early

Well boys, sorry once again for all of the lateness. had a crazy week. college football is starting to shape up, meaning that we have our first successful predictions of the year. So, from now on, we will have a 4th category in the totals, this one being the successful predictions category. This week, Florida and Bama locked up their inevitable match up in the SEC title game, giving everybody 15 points for picking that correctly. However, Joe and Colin had Bama in the game, too. This gives them an additional 15 points for that, plus 15 more points for picking the exact game. So, the way it looks for prediction points is this.

Colin/Joe 45
Everyone else 15

In Big 12 north news, it appears that the last game of the regular season between Nebraska and Kansas St could be the decider on who plays (most likely) Texas for the Big 12 championship. That's a suprise, and it's a meaningful game, because several people picked Nebraska to play for the Big 12 championship this year.

In other Big 12 news, Rob's national championship team, Oklahoma, dropped to 5-4 on the season.

The ACC is shaping up. Clemson (who none of us picked) controls their own destiny in the ACC Atlantic divison. The only other team with a shot to displace them is BC (who none of us picked)
On the other side, GT also controls their own destiny, needing only to defeat Duke to win the ACC coastal division. If this happens, it will guarantee that Voyten is the only person that will gain prediction points off of the ACC this season.

The Big East has scheduled intelligently again, their top 3 teams, Cinci, Pitt, and WVU, play each other for the Big East title in the next few weeks. All three teams are esentially in a win out and you're in situation. Cinci and WVU did so, suspectly holding off the Big East's bottom rung teams, while Pitt looked strong again. Geiss, Jim, & Joe have WVU winning the Big East, while Shawn, Andrew, and Munez have Pitt.

The Big 10 is essentially down to Iowa and Ohio St. Meaning that if Ohio St can win out, myself, Geiss, Jim, Shawn, Andrew, and Munez will gain points. If Iowa wins, then nobody will get any points.

Conference USA remains my favorite conference to follow for football God on a week to week basis. Houston's awesome comeback against Tulsa knocked them out of contention for the conference, assuring that Rob & Munez won't correctly predict the champion. However, the rest of us, who chose ECU, Marshall, Houston, and Southern Miss to win the conference are still very much alive. Also, Southern Methodist remains a contender. However, they would need Houston to slip up to have a chance.

The Mountain West has their biggest game of the season coming up next weekend. TCU welcomes Utah to their home in a game that could essentially seal the Mountain West for them if they win. If they lose, then Utah is in the drivers seat, but still has BYU to play. Jim & I both had TCU winning it, while the rest of the field is split between BYU and Utah. Also, Colin's Colorado St pick is now 0-5 in conference play. Shoot yourself in the head.

The MAC is still clogged up and not worth talking about. 5 people's choices are out, 5 of ours still have chances.

The Sun Belt is Troy's to lose, and the WAC still has all of it's big games to be played.

Oregon's loss has opened the PAC 10 to all sorts of wonderful scenarios. Oregon and Arizona are currently in the lead, with Stanford, Oregon St, and USC all one game behind. Oregon still has to play Arizona & Stanford. Arizona still plays Oregon & USC. Stanford plays USC next weekend. USC stanford and Arizona. And Oregon St plays Oregon. Tons of shit could still happen here.

So that's where we stand. One month of college football left, and this is all that's left to be done.

Onto the Pick 'Em. 14 out of the 22 games featured the underdog's beating the spread. This led to most people being near .500 or under for the week. Here are the totals.

Jim 12
Joe 12
Adam 11
Geiss 11
Rob 11
Folden 10
Voyten 9
Munez 9
Colin 9
Andrew 8

This brings the season totals to this

Adam 114
Folden 110
Colin 108
Andrew 108
Joe 104
Munez 101
Geiss 100
Jim 100
Voyten 97
Rob 93

With only 4 more weeks left in the regular season. I'll explain to you guys how the pay goes out for this. I looked up the rules a bit ago, because I didn't remember what we had said, and the way it works is this. The person who wins the college and pro pick 'em combined wins the $20 beans. I thought all year that these two were seperate, however I was wrong.

What this also means though is that when Bowl Season comes around we start things over. Each bowl game is done in pick 'em form with the regular bowls being worth 2 points and the BCS games 5. The NFL play off games are worth 5 points each and escalate throughout the rounds. We'll get more into that the further we get into the season. I realize that Football God rules need tweaked for next year, so any qualms you have with the structure this year make a note of and let me know.

NFL info tomorrow and Monday

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Week 9 Results - sorry it's late as balls

So this is week 8 of the NFL season. Let's start this post off differently. If the playoffs started tomorrow, these are the teams that would make the NFL playoffs.

AFC & NFC Division Winners

New England Phili/Dallas
Cincinnati Minnesota
Indianapolis New Orleans
Denver Arizona


Pittsburgh Phili/Dallas
Houston NY Giants/Atl

Let's start with fantasy of football

winners were

College Pick 'Em

Adam 12
Munez 12
Andrew 12
Colin 11
Folden 11
Voyten 9
Jim 9
Rob 8
Joe 8
Geiss 8

Pro Pick 'em

Jim 11
Rob 10
Colin 10
Adam 9
Geiss 9
voyten 9
Joe 7
Munez 7
Andrew 7
Folden 6


College Pick 'Em

Unless somebody gets incredibly hot, the college pick 'em may be a 4 man race at this point.

Adam 103
Andrew 100
Folden 100
Colin 99
Munez 92
Joe 92
Geiss 89
Voyten 88
Jim 88
Rob 82

Pro Pick 'em Overall

Munez and Folden both having down weeks last week allowed everybody to get back into this thing a little bit. Especially Jim who's killer week put him in a tie for first.

Jim 82
Munez 82
Colin 80
Geiss 78
Folden 78
Adam 76
Rob 75
Andrew 73
Voyten 70
Joe 70

Fantasy Bonus
Munez 70
Voyten 50
Colin 50
Geiss 40
Joe 40
Rob 40
Andrew 30
Folden 30
Jim 30
Adam 20

Overall totals

Munez 70 + 82 + 92 =244
Colin 80 + 99 + 50 = 229
Folden 30 + 78 + 100 = 208
Voyten 50 + 70 + 88 = 208
Geiss 40 + 78 + 89 = 207
Andrew 30 + 73 + 100 = 203
Joe 40 + 70 + 92 = 202
Jim 30 + 82 + 88 = 200
Adam 20 + 103 + 76 = 199
Rob 40 + 75 + 82 =197

Monday, October 26, 2009

Week 8 Results

No time for love this week, let's just get to the results.

College Pick 'em

Adam 15
Folden 15
Andrew 14
Munez 13
Colin 13
Geiss 12
Rob 12
Voyten 12
Joe 12
Jim 10


Adam 91
Folden 89
Andrew 88
Colin 88
Joe 84
Geiss 81
Munez 80
Voyten 79
Jim 79
Rob 74

This week's college games seem to be pretty tough to pick this week. Might be a tough week. Then again i suck dick.

Pro Pick 'em
Rob 11
Colin 10
Joe 10
Folden 9
Voyten 9
Andrew 8
Geiss 8
Adam 8
Munez 8
Jim 8


Munez 75
Folden 72
Jim 71
Colin 70
Geiss 69
Adam 67
Andrew 66
Rob 65
Joe 63
Voyten 61

Fantasy Football
Winners this week
Munez (dominant)
Shawn (dominant)

Overall fantasy points

Munez 60 points
Colin 50
Rob 40
Joe 40
Shawn 40
Andrew 30
Geiss 30
Jim 20
Folden 20
Adam 20

Overall Totals

1. Munez 60 + 75 + 80 = 215
2. Colin 50 +70 + 88 = 208
3. Joe = 40 + 63 +84 = 187
4. Andrew = 66 + 88 +30 = 184
5. Folden 72 + 89 + 20 = 181
6. Geiss = 30 + 69 + 81 =180
7. Shawn = 61 + 79 + 40 = 180
8. Rob = 65 + 74 + 40 = 179
9. Adam 91 + 67 + 20 = 178
10.Jim = 71 + 79 + 20 = 170

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Demi God & Donkey Dick

Ok, I'll make this quick, because I'm not on my computer. And I dont have pics right now. But I wanted to be fair.

Demi God for this week is Colin Reilly. He swept with a first place for the week in the pro pick 'em, college pick 'em, and won his fantasy football game. Pretty manly weekend.

Donkey Dick of the week, is me, i am bad, bad, bad. last place in life. Put a fork in me, I'm done.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Week 7 Updates

What's up my nerrrdssss. I'll try to give a decent review today, but the fact that my team put up 175 points and is currently down by 50 is giving me an I don't give a shit about the update attitude. But, i'll try to power through it.

College Football

I'll tell ya, we have a bunch of mother fuckers be droppin' shit in college this weekend, my nigggsss. 7 teams in the top 25 lost. Bumping such Football God favorites Pitt & WVU into the top 25, at number's 20 and 22, respectively. Before we get to the pick 'em, let's go through some college football RED OUTS first through EVERY CONFERENCE.

ACC - So far, the only two teams redded out for this year are my pick of UNC & Andrew's of FL ST. VT took a pretty big hit this weekend, which is incidentally the only team that anybody else picked this year.

Big 10 - Ohio St took a hit this weekend, making their games against Penn St and Iowa even more important than before. Ohio St has two loses, meaning that they are going to have to smoke a lot of pole throughout their last (insert # of games) to get themselves into the Rose Bowl for the (insert #) time in (insert #) years.

Big East - Cinci took it to South Florida this weekend. Putting a hit on my Big East pick. Rutgers lost to Pitt, officially redding out this pick for Rob, Folden, & Colin. Odd to me that Cinci is #5 in the country, returning Big East champs, and undefeated and not one of us chose them to repeat. Those with WVU & Pitt are still looking ok...For now.

SEC - all of us took Florida. All of us are still in wicked good shape.

PAC 10 - All of us took USC, they play Oregon in a couple of weeks, things should be clear there by then.

MAC - Me, Joe, Geiss, Jim & Folden all took Central Michigan to win. They are currently 4-0 in the conference, and their victory over Western Mich has led to a red out on that pick for Munez, Andrew, and Shawn. Colin's pick of Buffalo is 1-2 in the conference and dangerously close of being redded out on the season. Rob's pick of Ball St has been redded out since they took the field against North Texas in week 1.

Big 12 - All of us that had Texas look good. Rob looks bad. Really bad.

Sun Belt - We all had Troy, except for Colin who had Florida Atlantic. Pick of Troy is looking good, they are 3-0. Colin's pick, redded out. Strathmore on the mid major's Colin.

MWC- Speaking of Strathmore on the mid majors, Colin's pick of Colorado State in the Mountain West conference is looking pretty good, at 0-3 in the conference. Redded out. BYU, Utah, & TCU took the rest of our choices. Each is undefeated in the conference so far. TCU plays BYU this weekend, which is huge for conference (and BCS game) implications.

Conference USA - My favorite, the wildcard of the bunch. 5 different teams were picked from this conference; ECU, Houston, Marshall, Tulsa, & Southern Mississippi.

South Miss, Marshall, and ECU are currently tied for first in the east division, while Tulsa is leading the West, with Houston a game back at 1-1 in conference play.

WAC - we all had boise, boise is lookin' good. However, Boise vs Idaho may turn out to be a bigger game than anticipated. Idaho is 6-1 so far this season. Look out Broncos.

So, what was this for? Mainly, just so I could go through these and see where we all are.

Overall, we're all in pretty good shape still. Colin and Rob had a few suspect picks back fire in their faces, but it's still early.

Onto the college pick 'em for the week. I'm going to warn you, it's brutal from top to bottom.

Colin 9
Geiss 8
Shawn 8
Andrew 8
Joe - 7
Munez - 7
Rob 7
Jim 7
Adam 6
Folden 6

Although the scores were low, Me and Folden being in first and second and coming in last gave everybody the opportunity to pick up a couple of games. Here are the standings now on the season.

Adam 76
Colin 75
Andrew 74
Folden 74
Joe 72
Geiss 69
Jim 69
Shawn 67
Munez 67
Rob 62

Pro Pick 'em

Colin 10
Munez 10
Jim 9
Andrew 9
Rob 9
Joe 8
Geiss 8
Folden 8
Adam 8
Shawn 7

Overall for the year

Munez 67
Folden 63
Jim 63
Geiss 61
Colin 60
Adam 59
Andrew 58
Rob 54
Joe 53
Voyten 52

That brings us to fantasy football. Now, I am a loser, but I was curious, we all know the records, and how many points we've scored. But, I was curious, who has the most points against for the season. I did the math on Friday, and I was at the top, this was followed by Rob scoring 229 points against me.

Points Against for the season.

Adam- 973.04
Jim - 857.78
Geiss - 826.46
Voyten - 823.28
Joe - 791.1
Colin - 764.34
Folden - 750.14
Andrew - 755.94
Munez - 721.22
Rob - 718.4

So there you go, my team has faced people putting up points at such an impressive rate that it's more than 120 points higher than the next highest person, and it's over 250 points higher than the person who's team has faced the least amount of points (Rob).
Other interesting facts about our fantasy football season

(2) In Geiss' current 3 game losing streak he has lost by totals of 4/100's of a point, .56 of a point, and now 1.22 points for a total of 3 straight loses by a total of 1.82 points.

(3) His first loss in that losing streak was to Jim Who had preceded that week by losing by 3 points and followed it up with winning by 2 points, before losing to handily to Folden this week.

(4) If you doubled Jim's score this week, he would still have lost to Rob by 20 points.

(5) Rob won this week by scoring 9 more points than what his score would have been doubled last week.

(6) My team scored the 3rd highest amount of points of any team in our league all season and lost by more than 50 points.

(7) Rob now has the two highest weeks of scoring in this season. In those two games he scored j408 points. In his other 4 games, he's scored 447.64 points.

(8) In week 6 of this league, 6 out of 10 people scored over 150 points. In every other week combined it's only happened 11 times.

(9) Three games this week were settled by 2.18 points or less.

Onto the standings

Munez 5-1
Colin 5-1
Rob 4-2
Munez 3-3
Voyten 3-3
Andrew 3-3
Jim 2-4
Geiss 2-4
Folden 2-4
Adam 1-5

Season Totals

Colin 60 + 75 + 50 = 185
Munez 50 + 67 + 67 = 184
Andrew 58 74 30 = 162
Folden 74 63 20 = 157
Rob 54 62 40 = 156
Joe 53 72 30 = 155
Jim 63 69 20 = 152
Geiss 69 61 20 = 150
Voyten 52 67 30 = 149
Adam 76 59 10 = 145

There it is, demi god and donkey of the week will come tomorrow. I'm tired.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Updates Week 6

No time for a long post this week, but before the results, I need help getting Munez & Colin into the Varsity Blues fantasy football name fun. They are all that's stopping us from 10 for 10. Simultaneously they are also the top 2 teams in the fantasy football league, so maybe Varsity Blues names are for suckas.

College pick 'em

Adam 13
Rob 12
Andrew 12
Folden 11
Colin 11
Voyten 9
Joe 9
Geiss 8
Jim 7
Munez 6 (piss poor buddy)

Pro Pick 'em
Geiss 10
Munez 10
Andrew - 9
Folden - 9
Jim - 8
Colin - 8
Voyten - 8
Rob - 7
Joe - 7
Adam - 7

Fantasy, poor poor Geiss. He has lost his last two fantasy games by a COMBINED total of 1.6 points. That's fucking harsh. That small amount is all that's stopping him from being 4-1 instead of 2-3.

Munez 4-1
Colin 4-1
Joe 3-2
Shawn - 3-2
Rob 3-2
Andrew 2-3
Jim 2-3
Geiss 2-3
Folden 1-4
Adam 1-4

Red Outs

FL State - Andrew had them winning the ACC. All of us had them in the ACC Championship game. Done, over with. My ACC game of UNC vs FL State is completely redded out.

Overall Stadings:
There's now a bit more separation in the college pick 'em than there has been in recent weeks. Here are the totals

Adam 70
Folden 68
Andrew 66
Colin 66
Joe 65
Jim 62
Geiss 61
Munez 60
Voyten 59
Rob 55

Pro total

Munez - 57
Folden - 55
Jim - 54
Geiss -53
Adam 51
Colin - 50
Andrew - 49
Rob - 45
Voyten - 45
Joe -45

Overall standings:

Munez - 157
Colin - 156
Joe - 140
Jim - 136
Andrew - 135
Geiss - 134
Voyten - 134
Folden -133
Adam - 131
Rob - 130

Demi God Week 6:

Nobody deserves it, nobody played consistantly well in all three categories. For shame, bitches.

Donkey Dick of the Week

ALL OF US, BECAUSE WE COULDN'T PLAY CONSISTANTLY...but more realistically, probably your mom, because she sucks at it...

Sunday, October 4, 2009

So I'm going to explain something to you guys. When somebody makes a pre season prediction, and it starts to appear that that prediction will not come true, I usually highlight that prediction in red, to give myself a better indication of who is looking good and who is looking bad. That's not to say that the team can't rebound and get the red mark removed from their name. It's just for indicative purposes. Well, ladies, I can officially say that I have put my first red marks on the 2009 season. I'll go through each team that's been redded out.

Before I do that, I want to say something to the 5 people, Munez, Rob, Joe, Geiss, & Jim who picked both Florida and the Steelers to repeat as champions this year. I got curious so I looked up some statistics. In the 43 years since the Super Bowl started that has NEVER HAPPENED in the same season. Not once. Of course, there is a first for everything, but I did the research so I might as well write about it.

I'll start off by saying that you may notice that Rob's NFC representative in the Super Bowl, the Carolina Panthers, is not on this list. I'm going to Chet Stedman them here and give them one more.
Tennessee - Colin had them winning the division, and Jim and Folden both had them in the Wildcard. It is possible for them to get their shit together and go on a tear, winning a wild card spot. Unlikely, but possible. As far as winning the division goes there chances of that are FUCK and NO. 4 games back of the better Manning 4 games into the season. Sorry C-Bag. Seemed like a good choice to you and only you, and the rest of us seemed to know the reason. It's because of Kerry Collins stock...Strathmore. (I still appreciate his racism)
Oakland (Winning the AFC wildcard) Adam - You know this is me getting what I deserve. Honestly, they are 1-3 which by no means counts them out of wildcard contention. But, aside from the San Diego game they are a bad bad bad 1-3. I encourage each and every one of you to make fun of me in the comments section for making this pick. Please, I deserve it. Anybody who pins their hopes (and money) on Al Davis, Jamarcus Russel, & Tom Cable deserves the pain. Here is a picture of Darth Vader meeting the Emperor.

Denver (Top three picks) - 4-0. Pretty much ruins the chances of this one for Myself, Folden, Shawn, Andrew, Munez, and Rob.

(BCS Title Game) Rob - Well, pal, I don't know what to tell you. This makes sense compared to the rest of your picks. It really really does.

North Carolina (Win the ACC & play in a BCS game) Adam - Loses to above average Georgia Tech & below average Virginia have pretty much guarenteed this pick is not going to happen.

Ball St (Win the Mac) Rob - Ball St is 0-1 in their conference. That's not what got them the red out. What's gotten them a red out is going 0-5 including loses to North Texas, New Hampshire, Army, & Toledo. That team doesn't have a fucking shot

Florida Atlantic (Win the Sun Belt Conference) Colin - The conferences are different but the story's the same. Florida Atlantic International St University College A&M is 0-1 in conference play, but winless on the year.

Darrius Heyward Bay (or is it Bey) (Offensive Rookie of the Year) Andrew - Stats through 4 games: 1 catch - 18 yards. 'nuff said.

Ladainian Tomlinson (Offensive POY) Andrew - his stats are (barely) better than Darrius Heyward-BeyBay's.

Terrell Pryor (Heisman Trophy) Munez - Sorry, Bub, he's not even on the radar. I liked that you went out on a limb, but it's called going out on a limb for a reason.

On the Edge of joining the Red Outs - Florida St, Carolina Panthers, Miami Dolphins,

College football had a bit of parody as usual. Joe had a panty moistening performance, while Rob put up 6 points. I mean really Rob. Six goddamn points. Rob and i spoke on the internet last Saturday night for awhile. If Rob were to have made the opposite decision in every single pick that he's made this season he would be 4 games out of first place. Instead, he's 14. Here's how it worked out this week.

Joe - 12
Andrew - 11
Adam - 10
Jim - 10
Colin - 9
Munez - 9
Voyten - 8
Geiss - 8
Folden - 8
Rob - 6

In Fantasy Football news for this week, Munez has finally forced me to retire from my mocking of the snugness & location of the glove. Retard Mendenhall decided to have his coming out party for the sole reason of pushing my team to 1-3 on the season. Joe absolutely pounded Shawn, thanks to the manliness of David Garrard & Antonoio Gates. Andrew beat Rob putting them both at an even steven 2-2. Colin put up manly numbers again, raising his stock to 3-1.

In interesting Fantasy Football news for this week, Rob and I came to terms in the league's first trade of the season. I sent Anquan Boldin, Tony Gonzalez, and Willie Parker to Rob for Cedric Bensen, Greg Olson, & Roy Williams.

As I write this, Geiss and Jim are awaiting the end of the Vikings vs Packers games to find out who wins. The lead has switched hands like 4 times so far, and as of right now, Geiss is beating Jim by 6 100th's of a fucking point! I can't believe I'm actually enjoying keeping up with live scoring like this. My panties are fucking soaked.
And Jared Allen gets a sack! Jim is now up by less than a point on Geiss! Field goal by Green Bay! Will Jim lose any points for that...Now the waiting game begins.

Unoffically, Jimbo has won his first game of the season. Congrats buddy. If you guys want to see what this poor bastard had to go through to get a win, check out his schedule so far this year. He's scored at least 120 points each week, and his match ups have been TERRIBLE.
Here are the overall records.

Colin 3-1
Munez 3-1
Joe 3-1
Voyten 2-2
Andrew 2-2
Geiss 2-2
Rob 2-2
Jim 1-3
Adam 1-3
Folden 1-3

Pro Pick 'Em

Well I only lost one game this week, just like Jim in week 1 the Broncos kept me from reaching the 100% mark. Here are the weekly totals.

Adam - 13
Folden - 12
Andrew - 12
Geiss - 12
Jim - 11
Joe - 11
Munez - 11
Rob - 9
Colin - 9
Voyten - 9

Demi God
Honestly, Andrew had another solidly consistent week. 2nd in both pick 'ems and a fantasy win. But, I'm gonna have to give this guy to Joe Mclane. He dominated college and put up numbers in the pro pick 'em. Plus he had another good fantasy win. He's the man.

Donkey Dick
Honestly, I wanted to give it to Shawn this week. He lost his fantasy game, and did poorly in both pick 'ems. But, Rob was just worse. I mean, the dude got 6 points in the College Pick 'em, tied for last in the NFL pick 'em. Plus his predictions are getting redded out almost as quickly as mine.

So here you go Rob. Two weeks in a row. You suck donkey dick.

Now here we are, one quarter of the way through the NFL regular season, and...I don't know...31% of the way through the College Football Season. Let's check out the overall totals.

College Football Pick 'Em

Folden - 57
Adam - 57
Joe - 56
Jim - 55
Colin - 55
Andrew - 54
Munez - 54
Geiss - 53
Voyten - 50
Rob - 43

NFL Pick 'Em

Munez - 47
Folden - 46
Jim - 46
Adam - 44
Geiss - 43
Colin - 42
Andrew - 40
Rob - 38
Joe - 38
Voyten - 37

Fantasy Football Bonus
Munez 30
Joe 30
Colin 30
Rob 20
Geiss 20
Andrew 20
Voyten 20
Folden 10
Jim 10
Adam 10


Munez 131 (LW 1 Even Steven)
Colin 127 (LW 2, Even)
Joe 124 (LW 5, (+3)
Geiss 116 (LW 4 (-1)
Andrew 114 (LW 9 (+4)
Folden 113 (LW 4 (-3)
Adam 111 (LW 7 (EVEN)
Jim 111 (LW 10 (+3)
Voyten 107 (LW 6 (-2)
Rob 101 (LW 8 (-2)

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Demi Gods & Donkey Dicks Week 4

Demi God

For this week, we're going to have a tie. Andrew & Geiss put up exact numbers in their the pic 'ems, and they both won their fantasy football games. I couldn't decide between my best friend of like 30 years and my brother of like 30 years, so I figured I'd flip a cup. But, then I realized, "Duh, Adam, you don't flip a cup to decide something, you flip a coin. Flipping a cup is for flip cup." So, instead I bought a twelve pack and played flip cup alone for the entire day. Then when I woke up from being passed out I realized that I still hadn't made up my mind about Demi God. So, I just made it a tie.

Donkey dick of the week

Going to have to give this one to old ROB "KLINGON" KLINGONSMITH
That's right pal. You're team isn't worth even the ten dollars you are putting your face in right now. Just kidding, you haven't been that bad. But, you did put up a sweet 15 points in pick em this week. That's right 15 points COMBINED. Folden put up 15 points in the College pick em alone. STRATHMORE STOCK BITCH. Not only that, but your team shit the bed in fantasy football, and your superbowl prediction teams are a combined 1-5. AND, one of your national championship teams already has a loss., you are going to be a lawyer someday...should probably keep you on my good side.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Football God Week 4

Another week in the books. In college football 4 of the top 10 teams in the country lost. 3 of which were to unranked teams. Penn State took a geriatric dump on their own chests, Ole Miss somehow let Steve Spurriur become relevant again, Miami made VT look like a good team, and Cal got absolutely SLAUGHTERED by Oregon. This does nothing but strengthen the argument that there should be no pre season rankings in College Football.

In other news, Boise State has been bumped up to #5 in the nation. Here's a question. If Boise St wins out, how many teams do you think will jump them. I mean we are 4 games into the season and although Boise is undefeated, their is no realistic chance that they will play for the national championship.

In the pick 'em this week, Folden put up a blistering 15 points. Andrew finally joined the party, picking up 13 points. The rest of us were meandering between 12 and 10, except for Joe who put up 9 points, and Rob who put up a dismally pathetic 7.

Good Pick, Better Pick, Worst Pick

Good picks this week, Jim & I took South Florida over Florida State, Folden & Munez took SMU over the 13.5 point spread, Geiss & Folden got Iowa over PSU, Jim & Folden got ASU over Georgia, & Me and Geiss got Stanford over Washington

An even better pick was Folden's foresight to take Miss St over LSU. I guess when you're going to go 15-6 you're going to get a lot of games right.

Worst Pick - It could go a lot of ways, but I think Rob & I taking Kentucky over Florida was a pretty obviously bad pick with only a three touchdown spread.

Below are the season leaders in college pick 'em.

In other news, conference play is finally underway for most teams. A couple of weeks down the road, I'll finally be able to give a detailed analysis of each conference, how things are looking and what not.

In the NFL, things were a bit odd today. The Denver Broncos improved to 3-0, the Bengals went to 2-1, dropping the Steelers to 1-2. The Jets are 3-0. The Saints are 3-0, San Fran is 2-1. None of those teams made the playoffs last year. Besides the Broncos, Jets, and Saints, the Colts, Ravens, Giants, & Vikings are undefeated. Minnesota accomplished this on the pants wetting throw by Brett Favre to (didn't know he was still in the league) Greg Lewis.

As far as our pre-season predictions go, my picks are looking good so far, as the Colts and Vikings are both undefeated so far. The only teams anybody had in the Superbowl that have a losing record so far are the Steelers and the Panthers. Every other team is either 3-0 or 2-1.

Actually, altogether Tennessee, Carolina, Arizona, Pittsburgh, & Miami are a combined 2-13 so far. These teams went a combined 57-23 last year. All of them went to the playoffs, 3 of them had first round byes, all 5 won their divisons, and 2 of them played in the Superbowl.

Good Pick, Better Pick, Worst Pick

Good picks for the week - Munez & Voyten taking Jacksonville over Houston was good. Also, Geiss, Folden, and Jim had Denver over the Raiders.

Better pick - My pick of the Lions winning over Washington was the best pick of the week. That's how you sit in a chair. Also, Andrew being the only one to take the Jets over Tennessee was some good picking.

Worst picks of the week - This one has to go to Rob. He took 0-2 Carolina over Dallas on the road. Not savvy.

NFL picks of the week total

Voyten - 12
Munez - 11
Geiss - 11
Adam - 11
Joe - 11
Folden - 11
Andrew - 10
Colin - 10
Jim - 10
Rob - 8

Overall Results


Folden - 49
Adam - 47
Colin - 46
Jim - 45
Munez - 45
Geiss - 45
Joe - 44
Andrew - 43
Voyten - 42
Rob - 37 (is it too early to start figuring out Rob's elimination number here)


Munez - 36
Jim - 35
Folden - 34
Colin - 33
Adam - 31 (oddly, Geiss & I have had the same record all three weeks so far)
Geiss - 31
Rob - 29
Voyten - 28
Andrew - 28
Joe - 27

Fantasy Football

Joe - 20
Voyten - 20
Rob - 20
Colin - 20
Geiss - 20
Munez - 20
Adam - 10
Folden - 10
Andrew - 10
Jim - 0

Overall Total (Make sure to re do the math on your self. I do these quickly and believe it or not, i am fallible)

1. Munez - 101 (LW 3 ^2)
2. Colin - 99 (LW 1 (-1)
3. Geiss - 96 (LW 6 (^3)
4. Folden - 93 (LW 4 Even Steven)
5. Joe - 91 (LW 7 (^2)
6. Voyten - 90 (LW 9 (^3)
7. Adam - 88 (LW 5 (-2)
8. Rob - 86 (LW 2 (-6)
9. Andrew - 81 (LW 10 (^1)
10. Jim - 80 (LW 8 (-2)

Congrats Munez, you rose to the cream of the crop. I'm proud of you. I'll do the Demi God & Donkey Dick tomorrow. L8er Sk8ers.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Week 3 Results Show: Part 2

Well, I'm going to avoid showing any pictures this post, because my eye balls hurt. We'll get down to the stank nast.

The 49ers are 2-0 defeating the Cardinals and the Seahawks in their first two games. Suck my dick.

People who picked Atlanta and New Orleans are happy. Each are 2-0 early on in the season. Of course Rob's super bowl pick Carolina is 0-2 in that division. Soon, Rob may have the first big casualty of the season, for his Super Bowl loser.

The NY Giants took advantage of Tony Romo's bed shitting Sunday Night en route to a last second victory. They also stand at 2-0.

And the Minnesota Favre stand at 2-0, having beat the Cleveland Browns and the Detroit Lions this season. They will have their next barn burner next week against win less St.Louis.

In the AFC, 3 teams that nobody had winning their divisions are sitting at the top. The New York Jets, Baltimore, & the Broncos. Everybody can rest easily though, as the only 100% sure fire thing to happen this season is for San Diego to win the west. Folden was the only one with the foresight to pick the Jets, but he didn't man up enough to put them at the division win. Only at the wild card level. And the Ravens are 2-0 after beating the AFC west to start the season.

In the AFC South the Colts took two difficult games down to the wire to start 2-0 for like the 1,000th time in a row.

In the pro pick 'em Folden & Munez tied with a nice 11 out of 16. Colin, Rob, & Jim all put up 10. That's when things start to get bad, with myself and Geiss only going 8-8, Andrew only going 7-99, and Shawn & Joe going 5-11 a piece.

So for the season, here is your leader board.

Munez 25
Jim 25
Folden 23
Colin 23
Rob 21
Geiss 20
Adam 20
Andrew 18
Joe 16
Voyten 16

The college standings for the season so far are

Adam 35
Joe 35
Colin 35
Munez 35
Folden 34
Jim 34
Geiss 33
Voyten 32
Rob 30
Andrew 30

Plus all of these people got the ten point bonus for their fantasy wins this week. Those are the following


So now we have our current point standings.

Current Standings
(Last Week Results on the Right)
1. Colin 78 2 (^1)
2. Rob 71 5 (^3)
3. Munez 70 T6 (^3)
4. Folden 67 T6 (^2)
5. Adam 65 1 (- 4)
6. Geiss 63 3 (-3)
7. Joe 61 4 (-3)
8. Jim 59 8 (" ")
9. Voyten 58 9 (" ")
10.Andrew 48 10 (" ")

Football Demi God of the Week

Gonna have to give it to the man, Colin Reilly. Check that, Chris Everett. Colin not only won his fantasy football game, tied for the win in college football pick 'em, but he also tied for 3rd, one of the victory in the pro pick 'em. Pretty fucking manly

In case you guys were wondering, YES, Colin loves his Beaver in the process of shaving, while looking in a vanity mirror.

Donkey Dick of the Week

This one was kind of tough for me. Sunday, when I realized that Joe had forgotten to many any pics for the Sunday 1:00 games, I had automatically penciled him in. But, when Voyten finished the week tied with Joe with only 5 correct predictions, even though he had 9 chances more than Joe to break that tie. Briefly my decision wavered. However, in the end Joe wins it.

Let's just put it this way. Forgetting is Strathmore Stock. Even if you decide spur of the moment to drive to Alabama to watch WVU shit their faces, you can still take the 5 minutes at any point of the week to make your choices. And, anybody who forgets in the future, learn from this cautionary tale. There's $20 beans available here, but more importantly...Pride

Get your picks in (that means you Joe.)

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Sexy Week 3 Updates: Part 1

Yo, what's up my dickles? I'm back with a boner ready to tell you all about the stanky cheese that went down in the game of sports this weekend so far.

Let's start off with the obvious. Geiss's National Championship Pick, USC, lost this weekend to Washington. This makes 3 people who have had their a team playing in their National Championship losing in the first 3 weeks of the season. OH MY!

In a move that makes absolutely no sense to me whatsoever, the AP voted the Hurricanes #9 in the country. This means that Miami has gone from unranked to a top 10 team by beating Florida St & Georgia Tech, two slightly above average programs from the ACC. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT be suprised when this unrealistic and undeserved acclaim train hits the fucking wall down the road.

Speaking of undeserving. After losing to Miami and almost losing to Jacksonville St, Florida St got back into the top 25 jumping to fucking 18th in the country, by stomping a mid major. The voters really want the ACC to be good, don't they. I mean they just cum in their pants over it.
just like you guys while you read the sexy updates.
What this means for our preseason predictions is that Miami is 2-0 in the ACC. Georgia Tech's loss puts them down a little bit for Shawn, and I mentioned Florida St so that I could put pictures of Jenn Sturger's sexy tits up.

In other news USC fell to #12, Oklahoma is up to #10, and Ohio State fell two spots to #13, even though they crushed their opponent this weekend. That being said, Geiss, Shawn, and Rob's picks for National Championship Game teams still have a shot to rise back up to the top. Unlikely, but it's better to lose early than late.

In other news WVU showcased supreme choking capabilities, it was a good 4 years, it's time for the mediocrity to resume.
Penn State refused to cover the spread again.

And Pitt played...nobody really noticed. Especially not the voters of the Top 25 poll.

In the College Pick 'em this week. Jim & Colin kept their momentum running getting an impressive 14 games a piece. Right behind them Joe & Munez had 13. The full results are below.

Jim 14
Colin 14
Munez 13
Joe 13
Adam 12
Geiss 12
Voyten 10
Rob 10
Folden 10
Andrew 9

I hope you all enjoyed your sexy updates. I'll be back tomorrow or Tuesday with the NFL updates and updated standings.
Andrew 9

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Football God Week 2: Part 2

Ok, now that those pesky Monday Night games are over with, and I have a few minutes to sit down and blog, let's get to it. We'll start with the pro picks for the NFL's first week. Jim came out with a redonk 15 of 16 correct predictions. The fluke Denver touchdown being the only thing that stopped him from a perfect score. Directly behind him was Munez, whose glove fit a little better with 14 points.

Here is how the scores came out for the week
Jim 15
Munez 14
Colin 13
Adam 12
Folden 12
Geiss 12
Joe 11
Voyten 11
Andrew 11
Rob 11

Add in the college scores so far:
Folden 24
Adam 23
Shawn 22
Munez 22
Joe 22
Geiss 21
Colin 21
Andrew 21
Rob 20
Jim 20

Also add the 10 points that the winners of week one fantasy football won

That means that right now, the Football God leader board looks like this

Adam 45
Colin 44
Geiss 43
Joe 43
Rob 43
Munez 36
Folden 36
Jim 35
Shawn 33
Andrew 32

So there you go, 2 weeks into the season and I'm winning. I might as well enjoy it now, because that most assuredly won't continue. It would have been interesting if Geiss and I had played in week 1 of the fantasy football season, because I would have beaten him by 1/5th of a point.

So let's move on to our Football Demi God of the week

Jim and Folden each looked good with there pro and college pick 'em scores, but neither won their fantasy game. Colin showed some overall consistancy, but his college picks hurt him a bit this week. Without showing favoritism I am going to have to give it to myself. I finished in third in the pro pick 'em, second in the college, and I won my fantasy football game. That's overall consistancy.

For the donkey dick award for the week, going to the guy who sucked the most donkey dick, I was really wanting to give it to Rob, just to insight a rivalry, but he had to scrape his shit together at the last second and win his fantasy game. So instead, I'm going to have to give it to the elder Johnson. Tied for last in the pro pick 'em, tied for last in the college pick 'em and lost his fantasy football game. Andrew sucked the most donkey dick this week.

So, get those pick 'em pics in and get those fantasy rosters ready. We are finally underway of what's sure to be a great season

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Football God Week 2: Part 1

Well, well, well. Two weeks in and we already have our second loss by somebody's choice for a National Championship team. Freshman Quarterback Charles (Matt) Barkley did two things this weekend to make him one of my favorite college quarterbacks. First, he beat THE Ohio State, a team I couldn't hate anymore if they raped my mother. Secondly, his post game interview with (insert minority side line reporter here) was the closest thing I've ever seen to an oblivious reenactment to Will Ferrell's post race interview in Talladega Nights. He clearly didn't know what to do with his hands.

That means that so far Shawn and Rob's losers in the National Championship are already losers themselves. That leaves USC, Florida, and Texas as the only teams that people put in the National Championship without a loss yet. And, if Oklahoma & OSU win out they still could make it to the championship, because if you're going to loss, better to do it early.

In hilarious news, Andrew's pick to win the ACC fought a long hard battle with nemesis Jacksonville St, needing every allowable quarter to work it's way to victory. How do you go from putting on a vintage game against Miami that could elevate your team back up to National powerhouse status to dukeing it out against a team that I've never heard of. Piss fucking poor.

Florida dominated Troy, who we all have winning that one conference. I think. I don't know. Maybe Colin picked something different. Here is a picture of Tim Teebow during the game.

In good for one program bad for another news, Houston who a couple of people picked to win...Conference USA? The Mac? Not sure really, upset Oklahoma St who proved they were much more overrated than their ranking indicated.

Not a lot else happened this weekend. Mediocre Michigan upset mediocre Notre Dame, who myself, Shawn, and Rob each picked, further solidifying Rob's position as the cancer for teams taht he picked for this season. Cinci & Oklahoma beat their opponents by a combined 2 billion points, and God spent a little bit more time on Geiss, because he's so handsome, you see.

In this weeks Pick 'Em Folden led the way, scoring 13 points. This was followed by 12 for myself and Geiss. The glove started to fit a little better, with Munez putting up 11 points, along with Joe & Jim. Andrew, Shawn, Colin, & Rob got what they deserved, picking the cover for most teams this week and responded with a mediocre 10 points.

For the season, Folden now has a slim lead with 24 points. I'm right behind him with 23 points. Voyten, Munez, and Joe are next with 22 points. Geiss, Colin, & Andrew are next with 21 points, and Rob & Jim bring up the rear with 20. Geiss, I'm gonna call you out here. You usually have lovely little quotes from funny movies as your name, and I think you can do better than Pineapple Express. I expect more from you.

Moving on to the Pros, which thank the fucking god finally got started this weekend. The NFL kicked off on Thursday with a vomit inducing performance by the Black Eyed Peas & Tim McGraw. Dumb. The Steelers & Titans opened up the season with an entertaining game. Both teams played stout defense, and Kerry Collins appeared sober.
However, other reports are that he's still racist.

Big Ben managed to chill out for the better part of three quarters before finally getting involved in the game. Although I feel like the Steelers were outplayed, they found a way to win.

In Sunday's games, Drew Brees made the Lions smell their assholes off of his cock, by throwing 6 touchdown passes. The NO defense punished Matt Stafford's ugly ass in his first game as a pro, while my defensive rookie of the year pick Malcolm Jenkins racked up an impressive 1 tackle.

Also, the Broncos avoided their first of many loses this season, based on a fluke play that led to victory. I don't think it was good luck that helped them out, but more the habitual terrible luck of the Bengals. I'm going to use this a great time to segway into a story from the NFL Draft this year that Shawn & I attended.

We sat behind a group of Bengals fans. As soon they were on the clock they started chanting, "Draft a G.M" referring to Mike Brown, the owner of the Bengals who refuses to spend money/attempt to win games. I spoke to the guys, and they revealed themselves as the writerss of the Cincinnati based blog After several minutes, the Bengals pick was in, and Roger Goddell (spelled right) announced that the Bengals had drafted trouble offensive lineman Andre Smith. IMMEDIATELY, one of the guys snatched a paper bag up from under his chair and throw it over his head. It was without a doubt, the most entertaining moment of the day. And I'm not underplaying the draft, it was a ton of fun. It was just the perfect moment of anguish, self and city loathing, and comedic timing.

That being said, I could never hate the Bengals, because their fans (aside from a couple of fleeting moments half a decade ago) are the Football version of the Pittsburgh Pirates. That franchise is worse than the Lions, worse than the Raiders. At least for the past two decades they are.

Also, in other funny Rob makes bad picks news, Rob's superbowl pick the Carolina Panthers got hammered all day long by Football God NFC favorite Phili. In perfectly set up drama, McNabb got hurt, making people wonder if Vick will get the week 3 start. Jake Delhomme looked like Strathmore Stock, turning the ball over 5 times. This means that in Jake "The Jakes" last two games he has turned the ball over 11 mother fucking times. That, my comrades, is the worst fucking thing that I've ever heard.

I found other more accurate pictures that I could use for Jake Delhomme, but I had to use this one. This is a picture that is supposed to be depicting the quarterback controversy between Rodney Pete & Jake Delhomme from 5 or 6 years ago. This is the least inspired photoshop that I've ever seen in my life. What is it about Delhomme? He's always been one of those guys that gets the job done well enough to keep his job, but you know is never going to take you to the promised land. He's like the ME of the professional football world.

Also, San Fran HERE WE GOOOOOOO MOTHER FUCKERSSSSSS started their run of domination with a win against the go fuckyourself Cardinals this week. More like Mike Awesometary

Adrian Peterson whipped out his boner and beat it over the head of the Browns with 3 touchdowns and 180 yards. Manly. Perhaps it's too early to warrant Timmy T with the Jesus playing football figurine as a picture.

In other news, many people found the Texans an incredibly sexy pick this season (including Rob, of course). The Texans looked terrible, getting pounded by the suprisingly good looking New York Jets. Maybe Folden was onto something when he made that scary as fuck me in the ass pick of the Jets winning the Wildcard.

Part two Tomorrow Night or Tuesday morning.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

NFL Preseason Pics

Well Well Well, we got some preseasn NFL picks in. First, let's go through some stats

6 People have the Pittsburgh Steelers repeating as Super Bowl Champions. (Jim, Colin, Geiss, Joe, Rob, & Munez)

Aside from that we have 1 for NE (Andrew), 1 for Indianapolis (lil ol' me) 1 for San Diego (Shawn) and one for Phili (Folden)

The most popular choice for the Super Bowl this year was Pittsburgh vs Phili with 3 people choosing that. (Munez, Rob, & Jim) followed by 2 for the Pittsburgh Vs the New York Giants (Joe, & Geiss). The other Pittsburgh choice was Rob taking them to face Carolina.

Other Choices were my Indi vs Minnesota (hoping for the Peyton vs Brett match up one more time), San Diego vs Phili for Folden, San Diego vs Green Bay for Shawn, and New England vs Green Bay in a rematch of Superbowl 31 for Andrew.

Let's move on to those Conference Championship games. What many sports fans call the best week of football for a true football fan, before the corporate whoring of the Superbowl.

I shit you not, but every fucking person put Pittsburgh in the AFC Championship game. So if they go down we all go down. Some more than others. The overwhelming pick was (for the 34th time this decade) New England vs Pittsburgh (Geiss, Jim, Andrew, Munez, Rob, & Joe) myself with Indi vs Pitt, Shawn, Colin and Folden with Pittsburgh vs San Diego. How am I the only fucking person to put Indi in the AFC Championship? Is there something I don't know about going on? Did Peyton Manning sell his soul for a donut commercial?
Just so you guys know, if you type Shawn Voyten into a Google image search, this picture will be in the top 10 results
The NFC Championship provides a bit more variety. Suprisingly 3 people picked Phili vs Green Bay to play each other (Folden, Colin & Jim) I think Colin & Jim jerked each other off while they made their picks, because they are pretty fucking comparable. Odd, considering they've never met. Maybe they had cyber sex. 4 other people had Phili in the NFC championship. Myself & Munez have them playing the Vikings, Joe has them playing the Giants, and Rob has them playing Carolina. In other games, Geis has the most original pick of all of us taking Chicago vs the Giants, Shawn's taking Green Bay vs Dallas, Andrew taking New Orleans vs Green Bay.

Now let's run through the Divisons

AFC North

Everybody has Pittsburgh winning that one. Enough said

AFC East

Unanimous New England
P.S Bill Belichick hates it when you talk, while he fucks you in the ass

AFC West

San Diego gets 10. Everybody else gets 0
(Last year I took Denver and was preparing to cum in everybody else's face at week 14. Then Denver came in my face...I did not recover)

AFC South

8 People took the Colts
2 People didn't (Munez with Jacksonville & Colin with Tennessee)

NFC East

8 People took Phili
2 took the Giants (Folden and Geiss)

NFC Norris (I hate you Chris Berman)

GB - Jim, Shawn, Colin, & Rob
Minnesota - Me, Folden, Andrew, Munez,
Chicago - Joe & Geiss

NFC West

Arizona - Folden, Jim, Colin, Rob, Joe
Seattle - Shawn, Andrew, Geiss, Munez

NFC South

New Orleans - Me, Folden, Shawn, Andrew, Munez, and Joe
Atlanta - Jim & Geiss
Carolina - Colin & Rob

Wild Card
Now we have some fun, let's get to this one. I'm sure everybody's going to have some crazy fucking picks here right.


8 people took Baltimore to get in again. Not a bad choice, their schedule is softer than my rape eyes. (adam, jim, shawn, andrew, colin, munez, rob, joe)

Tennessee - The return of our favorite running back Glendale White was able to conjure up 2 picks (Jim & Folden)

Colin put Indi in with one of his choices, making Munez the only person to not put Indi in the playoffs.

The pick I'm already regretting making is my other wild card selection of putting the Oakland Raiders into the playoffs. San Fran and Oakland in the playoffs. Fuck me.

The Texans received a suprising 4 votes this season by Geiss, Andrew, Shawn, and Rob

Miami conjured up 3 votes from Geiss, Munez, and Joe

Who the fuck am I missing here. Only 19 picks so far. Never mind found it. It's Folden's other pick of the New York Jets (almost as bad as my Oakland pick)

NFC Wildcard

This will be more diverse so i'll just do each person and who they picked.

Adam - Dallas & Chicago
Geiss - Phili & Minnesota
Jim - Dallas & New York G
Folden - Green Bay & Phili
Shawn - Dallas & Chicago
Andrew - Green Bay & Atlanta
Colin - Atlanta & Minnesota
Munez - Took the NFC Championship of the 1990s Dallas vs San Fran HE'S DRINKING THE KOOL AID TOO, SAN FRAN MOTHER FUCKERS!!!!!
Rob - New Orleans & Minnesota
Joe - Green Bay & New York Giants

So the NFC is pretty diverse.

By the way. If someone has Dallas in the wildcard and they were to win the division the person gets half the points for putting them in the playoffs but getting which was wrong. So, instead of 30 points it would be 15. Dallas was just an example goes for any team

The Byes are almost exactly the same, so I'm not bothering with that. Same thing with the top 3 pics. You'll get all that in the attachment


This one was led by Spic Sanchez, garnering 4 votes (myself, Jim, Folden, & Colin). After that we got a lot of variety. Munez and Voyten took percy Harvin, Rob took UConn's Donald Brown, Joe went with Matt Stafford, Geiss took Knoshawn (i hate black people names) Moreno, & Andrew went with sure to be a bust Darrius Heyward Bey.

DROY Bunch of dudes...bunch of dudes...i tire of this the rest will be in the attachment.