Sunday, October 4, 2009

So I'm going to explain something to you guys. When somebody makes a pre season prediction, and it starts to appear that that prediction will not come true, I usually highlight that prediction in red, to give myself a better indication of who is looking good and who is looking bad. That's not to say that the team can't rebound and get the red mark removed from their name. It's just for indicative purposes. Well, ladies, I can officially say that I have put my first red marks on the 2009 season. I'll go through each team that's been redded out.

Before I do that, I want to say something to the 5 people, Munez, Rob, Joe, Geiss, & Jim who picked both Florida and the Steelers to repeat as champions this year. I got curious so I looked up some statistics. In the 43 years since the Super Bowl started that has NEVER HAPPENED in the same season. Not once. Of course, there is a first for everything, but I did the research so I might as well write about it.

I'll start off by saying that you may notice that Rob's NFC representative in the Super Bowl, the Carolina Panthers, is not on this list. I'm going to Chet Stedman them here and give them one more.
Tennessee - Colin had them winning the division, and Jim and Folden both had them in the Wildcard. It is possible for them to get their shit together and go on a tear, winning a wild card spot. Unlikely, but possible. As far as winning the division goes there chances of that are FUCK and NO. 4 games back of the better Manning 4 games into the season. Sorry C-Bag. Seemed like a good choice to you and only you, and the rest of us seemed to know the reason. It's because of Kerry Collins stock...Strathmore. (I still appreciate his racism)
Oakland (Winning the AFC wildcard) Adam - You know this is me getting what I deserve. Honestly, they are 1-3 which by no means counts them out of wildcard contention. But, aside from the San Diego game they are a bad bad bad 1-3. I encourage each and every one of you to make fun of me in the comments section for making this pick. Please, I deserve it. Anybody who pins their hopes (and money) on Al Davis, Jamarcus Russel, & Tom Cable deserves the pain. Here is a picture of Darth Vader meeting the Emperor.

Denver (Top three picks) - 4-0. Pretty much ruins the chances of this one for Myself, Folden, Shawn, Andrew, Munez, and Rob.

(BCS Title Game) Rob - Well, pal, I don't know what to tell you. This makes sense compared to the rest of your picks. It really really does.

North Carolina (Win the ACC & play in a BCS game) Adam - Loses to above average Georgia Tech & below average Virginia have pretty much guarenteed this pick is not going to happen.

Ball St (Win the Mac) Rob - Ball St is 0-1 in their conference. That's not what got them the red out. What's gotten them a red out is going 0-5 including loses to North Texas, New Hampshire, Army, & Toledo. That team doesn't have a fucking shot

Florida Atlantic (Win the Sun Belt Conference) Colin - The conferences are different but the story's the same. Florida Atlantic International St University College A&M is 0-1 in conference play, but winless on the year.

Darrius Heyward Bay (or is it Bey) (Offensive Rookie of the Year) Andrew - Stats through 4 games: 1 catch - 18 yards. 'nuff said.

Ladainian Tomlinson (Offensive POY) Andrew - his stats are (barely) better than Darrius Heyward-BeyBay's.

Terrell Pryor (Heisman Trophy) Munez - Sorry, Bub, he's not even on the radar. I liked that you went out on a limb, but it's called going out on a limb for a reason.

On the Edge of joining the Red Outs - Florida St, Carolina Panthers, Miami Dolphins,

College football had a bit of parody as usual. Joe had a panty moistening performance, while Rob put up 6 points. I mean really Rob. Six goddamn points. Rob and i spoke on the internet last Saturday night for awhile. If Rob were to have made the opposite decision in every single pick that he's made this season he would be 4 games out of first place. Instead, he's 14. Here's how it worked out this week.

Joe - 12
Andrew - 11
Adam - 10
Jim - 10
Colin - 9
Munez - 9
Voyten - 8
Geiss - 8
Folden - 8
Rob - 6

In Fantasy Football news for this week, Munez has finally forced me to retire from my mocking of the snugness & location of the glove. Retard Mendenhall decided to have his coming out party for the sole reason of pushing my team to 1-3 on the season. Joe absolutely pounded Shawn, thanks to the manliness of David Garrard & Antonoio Gates. Andrew beat Rob putting them both at an even steven 2-2. Colin put up manly numbers again, raising his stock to 3-1.

In interesting Fantasy Football news for this week, Rob and I came to terms in the league's first trade of the season. I sent Anquan Boldin, Tony Gonzalez, and Willie Parker to Rob for Cedric Bensen, Greg Olson, & Roy Williams.

As I write this, Geiss and Jim are awaiting the end of the Vikings vs Packers games to find out who wins. The lead has switched hands like 4 times so far, and as of right now, Geiss is beating Jim by 6 100th's of a fucking point! I can't believe I'm actually enjoying keeping up with live scoring like this. My panties are fucking soaked.
And Jared Allen gets a sack! Jim is now up by less than a point on Geiss! Field goal by Green Bay! Will Jim lose any points for that...Now the waiting game begins.

Unoffically, Jimbo has won his first game of the season. Congrats buddy. If you guys want to see what this poor bastard had to go through to get a win, check out his schedule so far this year. He's scored at least 120 points each week, and his match ups have been TERRIBLE.
Here are the overall records.

Colin 3-1
Munez 3-1
Joe 3-1
Voyten 2-2
Andrew 2-2
Geiss 2-2
Rob 2-2
Jim 1-3
Adam 1-3
Folden 1-3

Pro Pick 'Em

Well I only lost one game this week, just like Jim in week 1 the Broncos kept me from reaching the 100% mark. Here are the weekly totals.

Adam - 13
Folden - 12
Andrew - 12
Geiss - 12
Jim - 11
Joe - 11
Munez - 11
Rob - 9
Colin - 9
Voyten - 9

Demi God
Honestly, Andrew had another solidly consistent week. 2nd in both pick 'ems and a fantasy win. But, I'm gonna have to give this guy to Joe Mclane. He dominated college and put up numbers in the pro pick 'em. Plus he had another good fantasy win. He's the man.

Donkey Dick
Honestly, I wanted to give it to Shawn this week. He lost his fantasy game, and did poorly in both pick 'ems. But, Rob was just worse. I mean, the dude got 6 points in the College Pick 'em, tied for last in the NFL pick 'em. Plus his predictions are getting redded out almost as quickly as mine.

So here you go Rob. Two weeks in a row. You suck donkey dick.

Now here we are, one quarter of the way through the NFL regular season, and...I don't know...31% of the way through the College Football Season. Let's check out the overall totals.

College Football Pick 'Em

Folden - 57
Adam - 57
Joe - 56
Jim - 55
Colin - 55
Andrew - 54
Munez - 54
Geiss - 53
Voyten - 50
Rob - 43

NFL Pick 'Em

Munez - 47
Folden - 46
Jim - 46
Adam - 44
Geiss - 43
Colin - 42
Andrew - 40
Rob - 38
Joe - 38
Voyten - 37

Fantasy Football Bonus
Munez 30
Joe 30
Colin 30
Rob 20
Geiss 20
Andrew 20
Voyten 20
Folden 10
Jim 10
Adam 10


Munez 131 (LW 1 Even Steven)
Colin 127 (LW 2, Even)
Joe 124 (LW 5, (+3)
Geiss 116 (LW 4 (-1)
Andrew 114 (LW 9 (+4)
Folden 113 (LW 4 (-3)
Adam 111 (LW 7 (EVEN)
Jim 111 (LW 10 (+3)
Voyten 107 (LW 6 (-2)
Rob 101 (LW 8 (-2)

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